Preppy in Vermont

Mean Girl

2010-10-27T21:41:00.002-04:00

It's official. We have a bully at school.

Unfortunately this bully is a member of the staff and forty years old.

Not even kidding.

She is a mean girl to the core. You know she was that girl in middle school who spread rumors about people and excluded others and was just downright cruel.

It all started last week when she was upset about a decision that was made at a team meeting. (Which she blamed an INDIVIDUAL for making. Um, HELLO?!? It's a TEAM MEETING. TEAM DECISION. WHEN YOU SKIP THE MEETING YOU VETO OPINION.) Then? She cornered me about my Jazzercise prices and how they were too expensive.

I was willing to take the high road.

Today? She made my cooperating teacher cry and made a snide remark in the lunchroom about Jazzercise again- - "I think I might come to jazz tonight... I'd really love to come twice a week but I, JUST. CAN'T. AFFORD. IT."

OKAY LADY. I GET IT. YOU THINK IT'S TOO EXPENSIVE. GUESS WHAT?!?

I DON'T.

Also? I don't manage your family's budget. If you think it's too much money, don't come. SIMPLE AS THAT.

Because I'm a new teacher I'm really trying to keep quiet, go with the flow, and stay under the radar.

Meanie MaGee isn't making it too easy.

If she keeps this up? She's goin' DOWN.

I walked off the middle school playground about twelve years ago and I don't intend on going back.

Another Update

2010-10-25T18:10:00.003-04:00

Wow. I am REALLY terrible. It's been over a month since my last post. I'd like to say that I'm going to be more than a once-a-month blogger, but... I'm not going to make any promises. With such long breaks in between posts it's hard to know where to start, but since I just celebrated my birthday (26! WHOA!) yesterday, I think I'll start there.

And that? Begins with me saying that I have the best. boyfriend. ever. He is seriously amazing. He gets me COMPLETELY and totally loves that I'm NUTS 98% of the time. He is optimistic and life-loving and totally lights up a room when he walks in. He loves my family, he is kind and supportive and I could not be happier.

I know what you're thinking, it won't always be sunshine and rainbows but... I think it will.

So THERE. ;)

My birthday weekend started with the two of us getting some stuff done around his house in preparation for the party we were hosting there Sunday evening. We went to the gym, then headed home to shower and get ready for my birthday weekend getaway. He planned an entire weekend away for my birthday and I had no idea.

We had some errands to run before we left town (we bought a bedroom set and a living room set...

I KNOW!), so after we finished that we headed south on 89 and that was when he told me our destination: Topnotch in Stowe, VT. He got a room for the entire weekend and signed me up for a day at the spa on Saturday. It was, in one word, AMAZING. I relaxed, we went out to dinner, I slept in, read the paper in bed, and just enjoyed every minute of my birthday weekend.

It was incredible.

Sunday we came home and hosted a small birthday gathering at his house.

I am so loving my life right now it's amazing.

Life in Vermont

2010-09-22T19:28:00.003-04:00

I really have so much to say here and have just lacked the motivation to sit down and type it. It's not because I'm SUPER busy. Ironically, I'm the least stressed and most calm I have been in four years. For the first time... ever? I'm only working one job (for now) and am not in school. It is an amazingly liberating feeling.

I, stupidly, thought that since I'm making more money than I EVER HAVE BEFORE one job would cut it.

HAHA.

Those are my graduate loans laughing in my face. Remind me why I went back to school...?

Oh right. So I could get my sorry a** back to Vermont.

Well... here I am. I am living in a part of Vermont that I have never spent time in before and I am actually loving it. It's much more small town than I'm used to, especially coming from Fairfield County, Connecticut, but it is so idyllic and amazing. I walk to and from school every day. People you pass on the street say hello and, of course, everybody... knows EVERYBODY.

I have amazing views of the mountains which are just beginning to change to foliage colors, I have a river that runs through town that I run along every day, and most importantly, I have my own classroom that I have worked so hard for the last two years to get.

OF COURSE. Public school in rural Vermont is a MUCH different demographic than private school in CT. My class statistics are depressing and inspiring simultaneously. I'm trying to learn to keep my head above water with 1/4 of my class requiring special ed, 2/3 requiring special services, no classroom aid and one special per day. It's a challenge, but I feel like I have an amazing start to the year.

Some days I do find myself banging my head against my desk once the kids have left, but OVERALL, it's been pretty good. I actually have my first observation this week which is terrifying but I'd just as soon get it over with.

And. To top it all off. I have an amazing boyfriend. Like, an AMAZING boyfriend. And I could not be happier.

Life? Is pretty freakin' sweet these days.

Stayin' Alive

2010-09-13T22:02:00.001-04:00

I'm still here. Can you believe it? I'm sure NO ONE is reading this anymore, but... I'm back. Watch out.

Full updates coming soon.

I promise.

Coming to an End

2010-06-04T11:54:00.002-04:00

Last night we had a Jazzercise Girl's Night Out to celebrate some happenings of the instructors at our center. Two (including me) are moving, one is getting married, and one just became certified. I always have a hard time motivating for these types of activities, but I don't know why, I never regret going.

Last night was no exception. I had the *best* time. We started out the evening with drinks and dinner and the woman who planned the outing presented all of us with small gifts. I got a homemade trophy with my picture on it from the marathon, a picture frame with the play bill from Avenue Q (an inside joke- - I HATE that show), and a cute charm that says, "I (heart) CT". It was so sweet of them to think of me.

Karaoke was just getting started (we all signed up. Come on. 12 Jazzercise instructors at the same party? YOU BET people were singing and dancing) and I found myself at the bar with the owner of the center. I like her a lot, and really respect and admire how she manages everything. She offered to buy me a drink and took the opportunity to say how much she was going to miss me. It was very sweet, but what she said next really meant a lot. She told me that in all of her years of Jazzercise and all of her experience with instructors she rarely finds someone like me- - who is an incredible instructor, professional and "cool" as well. It was so sweet and I really appreciated her taking the time to say that. It makes what I do worth it.

During dinner we had all signed up and the karaoke was getting started so a group of three of us got it started with "Brick House" complete with wigs and feather boas. We do it right. People who know me in real life or have been reading this blog for a while know that my go-to song is Baby Got Back. I, of course, signed up for that with another instructor.

The next group of people got called up and they were NOT with our group. They were part of a softball team. Their song of choice?

BABY. GOT. BACK.

OH NO THEY DIDN'T!

They did. Only they? DID NOT. RESPECT. THE SONG. AT ALL. They didn't sing into the microphone. Had to READ the lyrics, and spent half the time giggling at themselves.

Oh YES. They did.

I was heartbroken. Everyone knows it's not in good taste to do the same song TWICE in one night.

Good thing I don't always act in "good taste" B*TCHES!

I marched over to the DJ and plead my case, "Listen, I know this is totally lame, but their rendition of Baby Got Back was lackluster. They obviously don't care about it in the same way I do. Please. If you let me do this song, in a few songs, I promise... you will NOT regret it."

He, miraculously, agreed. I think it had something to do with my saucy dress and killer dance moves. I'm just sayin'.

A few songs later, he called us up.

Before the song started, I took the opportunity to have the mic and addressed the crowd, "I'm really sorry about doing this. We're going to do a song that has already been sung tonight, BUT... and I would normally NEVER call anyone out like this... it was not done with the flourish that it should be. So, to the girls who already performed this song to night, I'm sorry. You're about to get shown up."

Oh, YES I DID.

And? In case you're wondering... WE. KILLED. IT. Like, cat-calls during and standing ovation at the end. LIKE, WE GOT FREE DRINK TICKETS FOR THE BEST KARAOKE PERFORMANCE OF THE NIGHT.

BOO to the YEA.

I may not be able to carry a tune in a bucket, but I can channel Sir-Mix-a-Lot like NO OTHER. It's a gift.

The Marathon: Part I

2010-06-01T19:39:00.004-04:00

Sunday was the BIG DAY. The day that I have been training for since January. The day that I have been waiting for with nervous anticipation for the past few weeks.

It did not disappoint. I woke up early to make sure I had plenty of time to eat something, drink some water, and get all of my stuff organized. Best friend S and his parents met me and my family at our house and we all headed down to the start of the race together.

Before we separated from the group S's mom handed us each a card. They were from S's older sister who couldn't be there, it was such a sweet gesture. We visited with everyone for a little bit near the start and made our way over to the Race Start.

I had never raced in a race this big before so I didn't know what to expect but it was actually very low key. You just kind of found your place and waited for the countdown. This was where I was the most nervous. The moments before the countdown were when I started to sweat and wish that I was simply spectating. Then the countdown hit zero and there was no turning back.

We snaked our way through downtown Burlington and were barely into our second mile when I heard a phone ringing.

Really. A man next to me answered his phone.

"Hello? Yea... I'm running the marathon... can I call you back?"

ANSWERED HIS PHONE. DURING THE MARATHON.

It takes all kinds I guess!

We looped around and headed north to a section of the marathon that is a 6 mile out and back. (Three each way.) This part of the marathon did not have many fans so many of the men used it to relieve themselves in relative privacy. And by privacy I mean in front of 1,500 other racers.

I actually didn't mind this part because as I ran out the faster runners were coming back in. I felt great about my pace and it was motivating to see the fastest runners in the race. It was during this leg that I saw three of my friends (two ahead, one behind) and it was fun to cheer for them and be cheered for BY them.

After running a marathon I will never, ever doubt the impact of the words and encouragement from spectators. It is truly amazing.

I started to slow down on the long gradual uphill at this point and was passed by the 3:30 finish pacers. Wow. I was impressed with myself- - I could still slow down considerably and still might make my 4 hour goal of a finish time!

As I crested the hill of this leg, I was passed by yet another pacing group. The 3:40's. Okay... I still had twenty minutes to account for if I could keep this pace going. I came off of the beltline and was greeted by one of my friends cheering. It was so excited to hear your name while you're out there running. It really is.

We wove our way back downtown and it was at this point that I saw my family for the first time since I started- - at mile 9. It was so exciting! My aunt handed me a wet paper towel as I ran by and it felt SO good to clean my face and hands. You wouldn't necessarily think so, but running is a very dirty/sticky sport. I was really hoping for some Bloks or Gu at this point, and I thought my mom would have them ready but I think they weren't quite sure how to get them to me and I wasn't sure that I wanted to wait for them, so I just kept running.

That? Was a big mistake.

Miles 9-14 were, in one word, pure MISERY. Luckily at mile 11 my dad HAPPENED to be on the street that I was running down. Thank god for that familiar, encouraging voice and face because I was ready to run STRAIGHT to the car. I'm not sure what happened mentally/physically/emotionally but at this point I could have called it quits. I felt like I was going SO SLOWLY and would NEVER reach the end. AND? I was barely halfway done.

At mile 11.5 I thought I heard my name but didn't see anyone I knew in the vicinity so I just kept running. Then, I heard my full name. I turned my head slightly and saw someone standing on the side of the road in a hot dog suit waving their hands, cheering for me. I still have NO idea who it was, but god bless them. They got me through mile 13.1.

Reaching the halfway point was bittersweet. I wanted to be proud of myself but it was a huge relay exchange so the new, fresh, runners kept BLOWING by me which was pretty disheartening. Also- - thinking about the last 13.1 miles and knowing you're about to do them ALL OVER AGAIN... made me want to find the nearest tree, curl up in a ball behind it, and cry.

Luckily miles 13 and 14 were flat, easy and heading back towards downtown. You could see the hotel we were running towards the entire time which was sort of like a beacon of light- -getting closer, and closer... and then all of a sudden you're almost to mile 15 and climbing the steepest hill of the race.

Really. And at the bottom of the hill there were Taiko drummers. It was probably the most ominous choice of music at that point. Like I was trying to outrun a tribal ritual where they eat you for dinner after you're grilled alive.

I'm not even kidding.

I knew my family was going to be around this point so I kept my eyes, up, focused and scanned the crowd the entire way up the hill. It might have cost me a few seconds, but finding them was super important to me at that point. I still had eleven miles to go and I needed encouragement.

As I almost reached the peak of the hill I saw Sister 2's skinny arm waving ahead. Then my eyes focused and I saw my whole family, my aunt, my uncle, the boys, and S's parents. Until you've run a marathon and have spent the last 14.5 miles gruelingly putting one foot in front of another, I don't think you can EVER truly appreciate having your whole family in once place, cheering for you. It was exactly what I needed. I ran straight over to them, and Sister4 had thoughtfully put two Bloks in her outstretched hand. I grabbed both of them and took one step. The first one fell out. I took another step and the second one fell.

DAMN IT.

The Marathon

2010-05-28T12:09:00.002-04:00

Is on Sunday. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?!?! It felt SO far away in January and February and all of the sudden. BAM. Here I am packing my sneakers, making a playlist for my ipod and icing my knee.

Yea... my knee. I did something to it about three weeks ago and haven't been able to run more than 3 miles at once since then. I'm extremely nervous for Sunday but hope that the adrenaline of actually being IN THE RACE will get me through it. I went to see a joint doctor, but he couldn't find anything seriously wrong so he prescribed an anti-inflammatory.

After training for this thing since JANUARY THIRD I will be more than devastated if I can't finish. Not to mention we've planned a rocking post-marathon party that well... would be embarrassing to attend if I didn't RUN the marathon.

At this point though, I feel great about all of my training and how I've prepared. I just hope it all pays off on Sunday.

Send me good (fast! HEALTHY!) thoughts!

Jersey

2010-05-23T18:56:00.003-04:00

My friend, S, called Thursday afternoon and asked if I would join him at his boss' wife's 50th birthday party on Saturday night. The party was across the Hudson in Jersey and only two people were invited from work so he was hoping to have a built-in someone to hang with. Me.

I called him Saturday afternoon to check in on timing and what I should wear. His response? "Totally casual. I'm wearing khakis and a button down." Okay, hmmm... I debated wearing a dress/skirt but decided that I didn't want to be over the top. It was cooling off and the party was around 6pm so I didn't want to look to daytime or too night-ish. I decided on black capris and a dressy printed top.

I had almost reached the UWS when I got a text from him, "Hey! Looks like we're leaving a little later for the party than I thought. Gonna head out around 8pm. We'll grab drinks here before we go."

Perfect!

I get to his apartment, sit down on the couch with a beer and see an invitation sitting on the coffee table. "PAR-TAY" No. Really.

I picked it up and started reading it. It was for the birthday party we were about to attend. It was being held at a restaurant and said, "Party starts at 8! Join us for dinner, drinks and lots of dancing!"

"Uhhhh, S? You didn't tell me this party was at a restaurant...I thought it was at their house!"

Him, "at a restaurant?!? WHAT!?"

Me: "Oh my gosh! Dinner and DANCING?!? I should have worn a dress! I can't believe you didn't tell me this!"

Him: "You look fine! I'm wearing khakis and a linen shirt. Really, you're fine!"

Me: "S!"

I don't know why guys don't understand this stuff!

We arrived at the party and it was like walking into an episode of Real Housewives: New Jersey. Everyone was dressed TO THE NINES. Seriously, this party was amazing. Drinks were flowing, appetizers were being served and the dance floor was hopping.

We were very late, but still hadn't missed dinner, but everyone was about two hours ahead of us intoxication-wise which kept it, VERY interesting.

The best part of the night was when the birthday girl's 18 year old daughter stood up, with the mic, and gave a speech.

"Mom. You know we love you so much. Thank you for everything you do, for raising two great kids who you love and for teaching me what's important: never wearing sweatpants and never leaving the house without a blow out. You're the best. KISSES!"

Really.

Bachelorette Parties

2010-05-21T11:41:00.003-04:00

As you know, I am in a wedding this summer. Of course, I will be attending the bride's bachelorette party hosted by her two sisters. Instead of doing one, wild night on the town we've rented a house on the cape for a weekend and will spend the weekend together celebrating.

This to me, sounds like a dream bachelorette party. There will be no strippers, we're all staying together and we can hit the beach during the day. We can stock the fridge and coolers too so it's reasonably economical. (Remember, the bride has ELEVEN. Count 'em: ELEVEN. bridesmaids so splitting ANYTHING eleven ways is... fairly reasonable.)

Here's the thing that I don't understand. Everyone's penchant for having male-genitalia themed EVERYTHING. We've been planning the weekend and the emails going around included supplies we would need for the party. Food, drinks, bedding, etc. Then people starting replying about items we would need to pick up at the "dirty" store.

Excuse me?

The "dirty" store?

I don't know about all of you, but I? Don't go there. Nor do I want to be at a party with items from there.

Let me assure you, I am no prude and I'm, for the most part, outgoing and liberal. I don't even mind certain items. But having p3nis (sorry, don't want spammers) shaped glasses, straws, hats, necklaces, plates and cakes REALLY does not appeal to me.

I don't get it.

It's not like everyone there hasn't seen one before. It's not as if the soon-to-be bride and groom haven't been living together for two years and she'll be preparing and anxiously awaiting a BIG night.

I really, just, DO NOT GET IT.

I don't think it's funny, and I just don't see the point.

Am I the crazy one here? What's the appeal?

Nobu

2010-05-19T20:48:00.003-04:00

My sister has been heading into the city every Tuesday night to have dinner with her (non)boyfriend. It's usually nice because it gives us a night apart, (I get the bed to myself), and it's nice for them to have a weeknight to spend some time together.

With my impeding move D, Sister 1 and I have been trying to squeeze weeknight hang-outs in to fulfill everything we want to do before M-Day and, my sister is always trying to get me to go into the city with her but with Jazzercise and other work stuff I rarely have time. Last night, she thought she'd try one more time and... I said yes. I didn't have too much else going on and had time to get a quick run in first. GAME ON.

Best Friend S, who lives in NYC, Sister 1 and I emailed back and forth all day long trying to make reservations for dinner. We tried five different places that were all booked.

For 8:30 on a Tuesday night.

Really. (SEE?!?!? THIS IS WHY I DON'T GO INTO THE CITY!!!)

J, (the non-boyfriend) was on his way home from a squash match and when we told him about our difficulty making a reservation he replied, "F*ck it. We're goin' to NOBU!"

I had never been there before, the only thing I knew was that it was fairly expensive... Sister 1, who has been there a few times, was PUMPED. She loves it there. We called S, told him to meet us down there and we headed down.

Can I just say one thing...

that dinner was probably the BEST dinner I've ever had in my entire life.

Because J has been there quite a few times and is very familiar with the menu we didn't even open them. He ordered for the table. We had (and I'll probably get ALL of these dishes incorrect): tuna tartar, jalapeno yellowtail, california roll, lettuce wraps, two versions of kobe beef, rock shrimp tempura, two desserts, sake and lychee martinis.

It was such a fun night, the four of us were able to relax, have a few drinks, an incredible dinner and catch up in a way that we haven't been able to in a while.

The bill was probably more than I make in a month, but...

J treated. :)

I'm usually very down to earth but sometimes it's awesome to (pretend) to live the high life.

Fore!

2010-05-18T12:12:00.003-04:00

I decided..."long ago, never to walk in anyone's shadow! If I fail, if I succeed at least I've lived as I believed!" (Excuse that tangent, as I re-read I decided I couldn't help but break into Whitney Housten-esque vocals.) I decided last summer that I wanted to learn how to play golf but with all of the classes I was enrolled in I really did NOT have the time. Also, it's kind of expensive and not exactly in the budget.

I mentioned at dinner one night last spring to Sister 2's (non)boyfriend's family that I wanted to learn how to play golf. They thought that sounded amazing and are all avid golfers. My sister, last summer, was NOT in support of golf. She felt that it took up too much time and took her (non)boyfriend away far too often.

I actually think she say have said one night. Over dinner to the entire family. OF GOLFERS. "I don't think you can consider it a SPORT if you're allowed to smoke and drink while doing it."

Yes. She's brazen and brassy and stubborn but... that's why we love her. (I think.)

Despite her very obvious feelings on the sport her (non)boyfriend's mother bought her a pair of golf shoes and offered to sign her up for lessons at their exclusive country club.

I was all, "HELLOOOOOO?!?!??!?! I'M THE ONE WHO WANTED TO LEARN HOW TO PLAY GOLF! I WANT THE SHOES! I WANT THE LESSONS! LOOK AT ME!"

Well, a year has passed and my sister's golf shoes have been collecting dust in a closet.

Until now.

I found reasonable golf lessons at a club near our house and we took our first one on Saturday. It was so awesome. The Pro could not have been nicer, the staff was so friendly and the club was very welcoming and non-snobby. (Something that is a LITTLE hard to find in the area that we live.)

We've been to the driving range twice since then and- - I quote- - my sister said she's "hooked."

We've got a long way to go before we get out on the course but let's hope this is the start to something great. I've got a feeling it is.

Officer

2010-05-17T13:32:00.003-04:00

So, the new guy from the bar last weekend is a police officer. Did I mention that? Well, Mr. Officer really cannot seem to get enough of me. He's a little over the top. And by a little, I mean a lot.

Here is a sampling of texts I've received from him in the past seven days:

"Yeah I have nothing better to do but text girls! Oh yea, forgot I only wanted to text ONE girl. YOU."

"I got no problem working for it! All I asked for was a shot!"

"Sweet dreams, I am looking forward to a date and glad I got to meet you."

"Have a great day beautiful!"

"Just wanted to say hi, thinking of you!"

"Remember that girl from the bar the other day? She got a tattoo of me cause I am her hero."

"Well, this big deal is off to the grocery store! I am looking forward to taking you out and workin' my game in person."

"Listen Woman! I don't have a lot of time, hockey is on and so are the Yankees so slow your roll down there! I know it's hard to focus, you will see me soon enough."

"Have fun! Don't be afraid to tell me how we will rock!"

"Enjoy, sweet dreams. Wish I was able to see you sooner than later."

"You and me some drinks the smell of the fire and my mix tape. I might get the courage to lean in for a kiss. HA."

"I'm so ready to buy you dinner."

"Baby I have to deal with SO much stuff right now! Don't know how late you are up but want you to know that I am thinking about you and am glad that i met you."

"Morning baby! Hope you get to rock that smile in the sun! "

"Wish I was your pool boy delivering you drinks..."

"I am 209lbs of twisted steel and sex appeal! Come on girl you know you laughed a little!"

I would type all of my responses but I don't have time for that and frankly, I don't respond to each text. I am NOT encouraging these types of texts though, let me assure you.

What can we learn from his texts thus far?

-He called me "woman". Something that, if you really know me, you will NEVER, EVER, EVER do. Nor would you refer to any other woman as "woman."

-He is a Yankees fan. (bleh.)

-He has started calling me "baby". I am, in no way shape or form, "baby". I know some people use it as a term of endearment and the first time someone EVER called me "babe" I was a little flattered, (I was also a junior in high school, so...) but I don't "do" terms of endearment so much. I have a name... use it.

D's Response

2010-05-14T11:15:00.002-04:00

My friend, D, always gives me a hard time about not updating my blog enough. OKAY D, pretty sure you had a rockin' blog for a hot minute that hasn't been updated since, ohhhh... you know... LAST MAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway. After reading my last blog post I received this from her in my inbox:

dont look that cute today. at all. your blog? you need to set an age limit to like 31. a person approaching 40 who is divorced has NOTHING in common with you. why buy damaged goods? divorced= either made a bad decision or is a douchebag as my kids would say and neither is a good choice. tell him to take a hike.

A Habitual Problem

2010-05-13T20:26:00.002-04:00

I think about what I want to write...ALL THE TIME. While I'm at school, while I'm working out, while I'm in the shower and then I get here, open up my laptop and?

...

...

...

this is what I get. It's so frustrating. I've GOT to start writing these ideas down. I promise they're not all totally lame.

I guess I can start with last weekend. I was home for a variety of reasons and ended up at the bar (GO FIGURE) Saturday afternoon at three. I wasn't drinking (yet) before you assume that I'm a complete lush (which I usually am), and it was just the regular crew of boys in there. Including Jax. Who would like nothing more than to get back together. But that's beside the point.

This unfamiliar guy (man) came in, sat down and started visiting with us. It was clear that he was very much "in" the group- - they all knew the same people and the same stories - - BUT I had never met him. Which, honestly, is unusual. I spend enough time there that people, even if we haven't met, at least look familiar.

After about twenty minutes of them chatting he came and sat next to me. It was getting a little weird because we were all talking together and I had NO idea who he was so I used the opportunity to introduce myself.

We chatted for a while, then my parents and sister came down and he moved to the other side of the bar. We didn't see each other again for the rest of the night but he did stop by on his way out t0 say that it was nice to meet me.

Then? He got home and sent me a Facebook message. And has sent about 498 messages/texts since then. He is CONVINCED that I'd be a great girl to date.

I'm not necessarily ruling it out, TOTALLY, but he has a little bit of a reputation, is divorced (WHAT IS IT WITH ME AND DIVORCED GUYS LATELY?!?!? IS THIS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU TURN 25??? YOU'RE DESTINED TO FIND SOMEONE WHO'S ALREADY BEEN MARRIED?!?! GOD!!!!!!!!), runs in the same social circle as Jax, and is 39.

I know.

He'd like to take me out on a date the next time I'm home, but I'm not quite sure... in some of his text messages he refers to me as, "woman" and? I'm SO not down with that.

To add fuel to my (non)dating fire one of Coach's (remember him?) very, very good friends came out for a drink later that night to celebrate my new job. What a sweet guy, huh? He immediately inquired about my status with Coach as they had spent the last weekend golfing together and knew that he had texted me the whole weekend. We sort of talked about things and he said, "Listen M, you are an amazing girl. Really. And you and Coach five years ago would have been perfect. You and Coach IN five years, would be perfect. You and Coach right now? NOT going to work? He's a mess, he doesn't know what he wants and he's a REAL asshole. You're too good for and you don't have time for this shit."

And... for one of the first times in my life, I completely agreed. As much as I like(d) Coach and would have like(d) something to work out. I don't have the time or patience in my life for guys like that. The old Me would have spent hours rationalizing how I'm the perfect girl and, of course it will work- - it's ME, but I've moved on from that. I think. I hope.

I also hope though, that I'm not destined to only get asked out by 34+ men who have one failed marriage under their belts. I'd like something, well... just something normal.

HA.

On Love and Luck

2010-05-03T13:10:00.003-04:00

I spent the weekend with my parents as they came to visit for a few days. My dad hasn't been since we moved INTO our apartment and my mom hasn't been since late October so it was fun to have them around show them all of our favorite places. Also, with my sister moving to a new apartment and me moving to Vermont we got a little bit of a jump-start on the moving process.

I know everyone probably feels like their parents are THE BEST, and they are probably REALLY great, but my parents? Are above and beyond normal greatness. They arrived late Thursday night and woke up when Sister 2 and I headed to work. My dad and I grabbed coffee at Dunkin' Donuts then we left for school and my parents headed to Greenwich to pick up a couch I had purchased on Craig's List. They drove it back to my apartment and brought it upstairs.

They met us at school for lunch, Mystery Bag and Poetry Cafe. They do ANYTHING and EVERYTHING that we need them to without even CARING. We shopped, my dad got a new cell phone, we went out to dinner(s) and breakfast and then, as the weekend was nearing it's end they helped me pack their car with everything I was sending home, drove it home, and unpacked it when they got there.

Most of my friends/family are responsible for all of this stuff by themselves. I am so grateful to have parents who really don't mind helping us out.

And? They were the last ones standing with me at the bar Saturday night. Then, we ordered a 6pack of Mic Ultra back to the room.

Seriously. My parents rock.

Are You There Vodka?

2010-04-29T10:04:00.003-04:00

I had a few hours to kill on Tuesday afternoon so I popped into the local bookstore and picked up a couple of fun reads. I haven't been reading much lately, but one of them, I COULD NOT PUT DOWN. Seriously, I finished it in one day. I actually don't find Chelsea THAT funny in "real" life or on tv and I don't often watch her show, but I laughed out loud while reading this book MANY times. If you're looking for a great summer/easy read. This one's for you.

A Day in the Life

2010-04-25T01:13:00.000-04:00

The past twenty-four hours have been some of the most awesome I’ve had in a while. Best friend D and I had to take the Praxis II (a CT/VT teacher certification test) this morning but we had a half day at school yesterday so we decided that we could take advantage of the early afternoon and head out for happy hour while still getting home at a reasonable time to rest for the test.

HA!

That’s me laughing in yesterday’s naive face.

We should have known better.

It started out innocently enough with one beer in an hour, a cheese board from Ginger Man and some perusal of the testing materials.

Then we ordered another beer.

Then we started dialing our friends.

Then we ordered a pizza.

Then one of our friends met us out.

Then we ordered another beer.

And another.

And sweet potato fries.

And a pulled chicken quesadilla.

And another beer.

Do you see where this is going?

Next thing I know we’re at the loft, wearing matching black and white fedoras we borrowed from two guys we met at the bar, DJ headphones on setting up an awesome playlist, and running the dance floor.

It’s an exhausting life we lead.

We made it home around midnight just in time to brush my teeth, drunk dial a few (11) people and lay down for the 5:45am alarm to go off.

Remember that test we had this morning?

Yea…we had to be there at 7:30am. Yikes.

You know that I am completely OCD so we arrived thirty minutes early and got situated in our room.

We’ve taken three tests in New York for teaching certification and the difference between these tests were incredible. New York is like a well-oiled machine who doesn’t give a F*ck WHO YOU ARE. They yell at you, treat you like idiots (to be fair, it’s mostly warranted- - you should SEE the people there), and then spit you out like last night’s beer you drank by mistake.

Connecticut is all sunshine and rainbows but completely unmanageable because of the lack of organization and incompetent proctors. It took the women in charge FIFTY-THREE minutes to hand out the tests and sign us in.

I wish I was kidding.

So, because Connecticut is sunshine and rainbows (and madly infuriating) D and I were assigned to the same room where we could choose our own seats. OUR OWN SEATS! And they requested that we sit near each other! The proctor hands us our exams and we look down to start reading- - there in a BOLD BOX is the text, “Calculators are permitted for the math section of this exam.”

WHAT?

We had not been notified that calculators were allowed. Typically NO ELECTRONIC DEVICES ARE PERMITTED.

NONE.

I asked the proctor if she had an extra calculator.

No luck.

So? We spent the next sixty minutes feverishly computing math by HAND. Seriously. I was doing long division in the margins.

When those unbearable 120 minutes were over we were STARVING so we headed to a local diner, then to my apartment so I could regroup. Then? We headed to Greenwich to see the Tall Ships.

I’ve been looking forward to seeing the Tall Ships all week. I love the water, I love boats, I love special events like this. We I had originally asked D if she wanted to come with me she responded, “Tall Ships? I don’t know what that is.”

She can give me a hard time all she wants for never having been on a sailboat but at least I know what the damn TALL SHIPS are!

Turns out part of the Tall Ships event is a fair complete with games, rides and fried dough. D suggested that we go on one.

I am a (semi) risk taker and have always loved rides. However, I have not actually BEEN on a ride? Well, I don’t think since high school honestly. Let me tell you, that ride was like jumping off a cliff.

SCARY.

INVIGORATING.

SUPER FUN.

I’m NOT kidding. We were the only two on the ride except for two ten year old boys. We laughed and screamed the ENTIRE time. I had to close my eyes and I couldn’t even control the noises that were coming out of my mouth. “Whoooooeeeeeee!” “Eeeeeeee.” At one point D turned to me and said, “WHAT are you SAYING?!!?”

I have no idea.

I felt like a rockstar.

We were laughing so hard by the time the ride ended we had tears streaming down our cheeks. It wasn’t that anything was THAT particularly funny, it was the ride. We had made it.

Then, we hopped down out of our chair.

I felt like I had been at sea for seven days; my legs were wobbly, my head was spinning and I couldn’t walk in a straight line. We sat down to rest on a bench overlooking the harbor and we soaked up the rays for an hour.

It was incredible.

It’s days (nights) like this that are going to make it hard to pack up and leave Connecticut. I’m just glad I’ve still got a few memories left to make.

(on a side note I drunkenly gave some guy my number at the bar last night. No, I’ll never learn. And he ACTUALLY CALLED ME TODAY. I’m not interested but this is the FIRST time that I’ve been here that a guy has ACTUALLY called after I’ve given them my number.)

Over It

2010-04-21T07:33:00.003-04:00

I have reached the point in the year where I am just. OVER. IT. I'm over everything. I'm ready to pack up the apartment, move home, be in summer-mode...I'm ready to relax.

I love my kids, and I love my job, I am just ready for that next point. To move on, to get acclimated in my new school, and to be in a new place.

I have also ordered an attitude adjustment for this morning. I'm hoping it arrives.

Givin' it Up

2010-04-20T11:47:00.002-04:00

I gave up shopping for Lent. Did I tell you that? I did. I used to be a SHOP-A-HOLIC. Honestly. I would just shop, shop, shop, shop, shop. I scaled back a little after college, and then SERIOUSLY scaled back when I moved to Connecticut because, let's be honest, making less than $20,000/year and putting yourself through graduate school while managing to not default on any loans and still contribute to a retirement account does NOT exactly leave a lot of money leftover in the budget.

AT ALL.

When Lent came around I thought about giving up dessert (HA!), or drinking (HA!HA!) or even diet coke, but shopping seemed like a more reasonably option. It would save me some money, I really don't NEED anything, and it would be kind of easy.

My sister, M, Sister 2 is basically the exact opposite of me. Well, we're either exactly the same or exactly opposite. Does that make sense?

We're opposite in regards to shopping.

I do.

She doesn't.

So when we ventured out this weekend on a little shopping spree, me to celebrate lent being over and having a real job lined up for the fall and her to celebrate ordering a vacation to West Palm and getting it, I didn't know what to expect.

Well...shop we did. For two days. It was amazing. We had so much fun and our friend D joined us and we were all in dressing rooms at the same time laughing, trying on clothes, gossiping, it was just like a scene out of a movie.

Sister 2 had a "look" she was going for in particular so the latter part of our shopping experience was trying to find white jeans. We looked at Gap and J Crew but didn't find anything with fit she was looking for.

We decided to try Banana Republic on our way home. In the back of the store they had a stack of 7 pairs of white jeans. We held them up. She didn't love them but I encouraged her to try them on.

She tried them on, turning from left to right, she wondered if they were too see-through. She stepped out of the dressing room to look in the large mirror. A woman was waiting for her daughter to try some things on and glanced up, "those look wonderful on you," she said, "what size are you?"

Sister 2 looked down at the tag, "Oh. 26waist, 00."

REALLY. a DOUBLE ZERO. HONEST TO GOD.

We stood in line to buy the jeans and we left with them in a small shopping bag.

That would have fit ONE pair of my underwear.

Not Sister 2 though. She got a whole dang pair of jeans in there.

If I didn't like her so much, I'd REALLY hate her.

Dreams

2010-04-19T07:36:00.000-04:00

I’m not one who over analyzes horoscopes or dreams but last night I had such a vivid dream it’s hard not to think about it a little. I took a small sailboat (I have NEVER been on a sailboat in my entire life) with my sisters and some family members across the ocean (that was in an enclosed building) to a glass building in the middle. The idea was that you could go down in the building and see all of the marine life. We had just gotten inside when we saw the first animal. An orca. It was amazingly beautiful and just crested through the swell of wave. Then we saw another one. And another one. And another one. Before we knew it I counted 22 orcas surrounded the building, swimming around. Then? It was like a flip switched and they all started to brush against the building. Then run into the building and they continued to ram the building until the glass was shattered and water was pouring into it.

Then I woke up.

Strange, right?

And I haven’t even watched Free Willy lately. Promise.

Miles to go Before I Sleep

2010-04-17T07:38:00.003-04:00

Today I had my longest run to date- - 20 miles. I know! I’m sitting on the couch now and I ache and it’s a little hard to go down the stairs, but overall? I feel pretty fantastic. If I had any doubt about my ability to actually do this- - to run 26.2 miles- - I think I can safely say it’s quelled. This was probably my slowest run yet (roughly 9 min/mile) but I have to expect that as the distances increase my time will decrease.

That IS how it works, RIGHT?!?

I wish I there was someway I could record my stream of thought while I’m out running because I’m never sure exactly how I get to certain inner monologues and honestly, it’s kind of fascinating. I was running for 2 hours and 45 minutes today.

PLENTY of time to cover a WHOLE LOT of topics in my head.

What I like the most though is when I’m so absorbed in thought that I don’t think about the act of running- - putting one foot in front of the other, how my right knee pulsates every time I step, how my outer foot bones and big left toe ache or how I’d give ANYTHING to trade places with the windsurfers in the water.

That’s definitely one thing I thought about today. As I rounded the corner and the beach came into full view I saw four people standing erect on top of the water, pulling on the strings of their sail to catch the best wind. At that moment, there was nothing I wanted more than to give my body to the wind, to let it take me wherever it wanted, to be weightless for a moment.

Instead, I took a deep breath of salt air, relished in the beauty of the ocean and the area that I live, and put one foot, once again, in front of the other.

G-Chatting with a Friend

2010-04-16T07:43:00.002-04:00

Discussing his weekend plans...

"I'll have to go out and find some girl with good looks and little morals tonight."

HA. I love my friends.

3rd Grade Geometry

2010-04-16T07:38:00.001-04:00

Directions: Draw a shape that has 6 angles. Draw as many triangles as you can inside.

Student: "Wait. Does angle mean point? Or line?"

Next Weekend

2010-04-15T22:12:00.003-04:00

I have babysitting jobs lined up for the next few weekends but a family asked me to babysit for the ENTIRE weekend next weekend. I have a test and another commitment so I asked my sister if she was interested in helping me out.

Her response?

"Oh! Next weekend?!? I'd love to! but... J" (the NON boyfriend...), "and I are heading to West Palm Beach! You should come!"

Uhhhhhhhh. REALLY?!?!?

Soul Mate vs Mate

2010-04-14T20:23:00.003-04:00

I've always been a hopeless romantic. Not so much in that I thought Prince Charming would swoop through town on a white horse, throw me on the back, and gallop me off into the sunset... more like, the man of my dreams would find me when I wasn't even looking, sweep me off of my feet, and the rest? Would be history.

See the difference?

The funny thing is, I can only define "man of my dreams" broadly. I'd like to think that this will increase my chances of actually finding someone but I also think it might send me in directions that aren't always the best. My friend D would agree with this whole heartedly. She feels that there are certain guys I'm willing to entertain the thought of dating that I should automatically say no to.

For me, there really is no automatic "No".

And, if I'm going to be honest, I can picture myself marrying *many* of the guys in my life right now. How ridiculous is that? I'm PRETTY convinced that I haven't yet met the person I will spend the rest of my life yet, BUT... if I HAD to marry someone I've met- - I would be okay with that.

Is that crazy?

I know some people believe in soul mates and maybe, in certain instances, that's true. Like the two people who accidentally bump into each other at a coffee shop and then end up married the next month, or the couple who gave up on love individually until they were both doing laundry at 9pm on a Friday night then lived happily ever after.

For me though- - I think you just find a mate. Someone who is at the same place in time that you are, who wants the same things, who you can love, who you can live with.

I just happen to be compatible with a lot of people.

Did I REALLY just type that?!?!?

My best friends and sisters (and ex-boyfriends) may say that I am NOT. That I am actually, generally INCOMPATIBLE, but I don't think that's true. When I think of the guys that I've dated recently and not-so-recently I can see a life with them. It wouldn't be perfect, but what relationship is?

Although, I have to admit each time I date someone I learn a little bit more about myself and what I want out of a relationship which, I GUESS means, I'm not doing this whole thing for NOTHING.

Best Text

2010-04-13T21:26:00.002-04:00

I received a text from my sister tonight, "Hey! I'm heading into the city to meet J..." ((the NON boyfriend)),"for dinner. Probably won't be back til the am to get ready for school."

!!!!!!!!!!!!

A bed to MYSELF tonight! Woop, woop!

I guess it really is the SMALL things we learn to appreciate...

1/2 Marathon, etc

2010-04-13T20:39:00.004-04:00

I was home (again) this weekend to run in the Vermont 1/2 Marathon Unplugged. I was really nervous because it was the first really official race I've ever run. I've run two 5k's before, one with timing chips, one without, but they paled in comparison to the seriousness of this one.

My mom and sister 3 woke up early with me and dropped S and I off at the start. They stayed for the start of the race then drove ahead to a checkpoint along the way to cheer us on. We thought that they'd then head to the finish to watch us, but they surprised us by stopping at one more stop before the end! I was amazed at how motivating it was to have people you know on the sidelines cheering for you. It definitely gave me the endurance push I needed to get to the end.

I had lost S by mile 5 (speedy- - whatever) but at the very end of the race you have to loop around and come back so we ended up passing each other with less than a mile left to go! S finished at 1:38 and walked back to find me and ran the last .25mile with me (all uphill). I don't know HOW he had the stamina to do that but it REALLY made me want to run faster because he was doing it for the SECOND time and still encouraging me. Yikes.

I finished at 1:48:40.

Being that this is my first real race I have NO sense of how that is overall for me, but I was excited!!! Less than two hours AND if I can keep that pace up for the FULL marathon I think I'll finish under 4 hours which is my goal!

My legs have been sore since Sunday which is a little unusual for me but I'm hoping some serious stretching between now and my 20miles on Friday should do the trick. My ass is also killing me due to my new love of regular underwear. After wearing thongs for the past 10 years my lower cheeks are having a hard time getting used to elastic digging into them (maybe that says something about the size of them?!?!). It's better than the alternative though- - chafing. I won't even GET into those details here. You can thank me later.

Yea, We Went Out Last Night

2010-04-09T11:13:00.002-04:00

My sister, D, and I all went out last night to celebrate the gorgeous weather we've having, SPRING, and my NEW JOB! Initially, I almost canceled because I just wasn't feeling it, but I'm so glad we motivated to go. We had *so* much fun.

We headed to The Ginger Man in SoNo. Have I mentioned how much we *love* Ginger Man? It's the best place EVA. We ordered our Blue Moons and the cheese plate...and then we started talking. And didn't stop until after midnight. I'm not even kidding. I don't know WHERE the time went, but before we knew it we were four rounds deep and ordering another pizza to top off the night. Really. We RARELY go out on school nights but when we do, I guess we go all the way.

As three teachers, who are best friends/sisters who work and live together you would think we'd have OTHER things to talk about besides our students. Notsomuch. I cannot IMAGINE what we'll be like when we have our OWN kids because we talked about our students ALL NIGHT LONG. We're all fairly exciting people but we hardly veered from talking about the kids. It's nuts.

Well... we did detour the conversation enough to debate the 2Birds1Blog debate about wiping position. (Please, go read that post if you need a laugh.) ((We're all sitters if you care). While I'm at it, Meg @ 2birds is quite possibly the funniest person ALIVE.

So we're sitting there chatting and I get a text from my mom, "Just had a lovely chat with Coach".

...

They were all at the bar together. I, of course, was DYING to know what they talked about because my own communication with Coach has been rather lackluster lately. (I cannot figure him out. I'm still trying to play it cool but am secretly hoping that I'll see him while I'm home this weekend. I'm not sure on ANY fronts how that will play out.) I almost texted him about it, but while I was contemplating that I got a text from him, "Just had a beer with your parents." Which started a texting conversation that lasted most of the night and ended with a drunken, 1am phone call.

My mom thinks he's "so nice", my dad thinks he's a player... I don't really care WHAT he is, as long as he's into me.

There, I said it.

I woke up this morning READY to go but I am fading...FAST.

Assistance

2010-04-08T09:50:00.003-04:00

I received an email from a parent of one of my students:

Hi Miss T,

Hope you are enjoying the incredible weather.
I don't know if you are on the babysitting, etc list, but I thought I'd
check to see if you might be able to help me this weekend at a party I'm
having. It's a casual party, and all you'd have to do is help me
put food out and wash plates. I know it's last minute, but my husband is
going to be away and I'd love the help. It would be from about 5:45 to
10 or earlier if you want. I will be at school for a meeting at 8 and
may check in to see if you're interested.

-Parent

Put out food? Wash plates? For a dinner party that she's having which will most likely have our other parents as guests? NO THANK YOU.

Seriously.

She came in this morning right at 8am to double check and when I told her I would be out of town for the weekend she responded, "Ohhh, I'll just use paper plates then."

SERIOUSLY?!?!??!?! She has to resort to PAPER PLATES because I WON'T BE THERE TO WASH DISHES?!?!??!

And SECONDLY. I'm pretty sure I didn't just shell out $30,000+ for a masters degree so I could wash dishes at family parties (other than my OWN) on the weekends.

That's not to say that I think I'm above ANY sort of job- - I'm NOT. I just can't believe the families around here sometimes.

Do your own damn dishes.

Marathon Update

2010-04-07T07:29:00.001-04:00

My sister has officially QUIT the marathon. What a loser. I cannot believe it. The whole reason I’ve been so dedicated to this training is because she was doing it with me. I had someone to commiserate with and someone to complain to and someone to head out on 10+ mile runs with.

Now? I come back from long runs and she’s freshly showered drinking a glass of wine.

B*tch.

We’re all signed up to run a ½ marathon this weekend to practice for the big day and I think she’ll still do that with us, but… it’s not the same as running the marathon with us. I hope she changes her mind before then but, if you know my sister, you KNOW that’s probably not happening. Once her mind is made up there is NO turning back.

The training has been going surprisingly well. It was warm-ish while I was in Vermont for two weeks so I got all of my runs in. I was supposed to run 19 miles last weekend, but I was home for Easter and a bridal shower and out drinking every night and the days just got away from me. That is the ONLY run that I’ve skipped this entire time so I hope it doesn’t hinder my training and ability to run the full marathon too much, but… the weekend was a freakin’ blast so I’m not TOO worried about it.

We’re on the downward slope of all of this training and I can’t wait until it’s over. Although, I’m not sure WHAT I’m going to do with all of this extra time. I haven’t quite figured out if this training has turned me into a runner or if I’m still just someone who runs occasionally. I guess we’ll find out soon enough.

Wedding Etiquette

2010-04-06T11:47:00.002-04:00

No...I'm not getting married. HA. I can barely keep a boyfriend and have so many non-husband- material boys in my tangled, tangled web there's not room for anyone else. BUT I am invited to two weddings this summer so, weddings are on the brain.

I know that everyone makes choices that are best for THEM on their wedding day and that is the way it should be. Believe me, when I do (finally) tie the knot I'm probably NOT going to take ol' Aunt Ida's personal preference into consideration. I get it- - your day, your decisions. Take it or leave it.

HOWEVER (you knew this was coming, right?!?!) , I just can't seem to shake this wedding issue that has presented itself recently and I wanted to get your opinion.

One of my best guy friends (P) is getting married this summer. Our other best friend is my friend S who I talk about here all the time (of Turkey Bowl fame). P & S have been best friends since kindergarten, I didn't come onto the scene until junior year of high school but since that day all three of us have been best friends. P and I were closer in college, but S and I are closest now and I would say that I am closer to each one of them than they are to each other.

When P started planning his wedding he asked S to be his best man. (via text message. I wish I was kidding.) I, honestly (crazily, I KNOW. I'm a freak.) kind of thought that I should be in the wedding too. I get it- - I'm not really friends with the bride, but I'm the BEST FRIEND. Sorry I'm a girl.

It's not going to work out. FINE.

Anyway. S and I were home for the weekend so we went to P and finance's for happy hour. As we were leaving P says to me, "Oh! Just so you know all 6 of you (my family) are invited to the wedding! But, numbers are a little tight so none of you got a +1." I didn't even have time to think about this and S says, "Oh! Did I get a +1??) and P responds, "Obviously. You're in the wedding party."

Uhhhhhhh.

I don't know how to feel about this. I'd be fine if S didn't get a +1 either, then we would just be together the whole night and I love my parents and sisters so we'll have fun together regardless, but...I'm a little miffed by the whole thing. One of my sisters LIVES with her boyfriend and has for over a year. I understand that I'm the "real" friend so if he didn't want my family to get the +1's that's fine, but shouldn't I still get one? I'm 25 years old, live in my own apartment and LAST HE KNEW... I had had a boyfriend.

Am I crazy here?!?!?! I told S the only reasonable solution is to bring ME as his +1 and then I'll get to go to the rehearsal dinner and sit at the head table anyway. Seems great to me. (And I'm a GREAT date). I called his sister to get her advice and she agreed with me too. She said, as the best man, it's his responsibility to fix it. ;)

What do YOU think?!!??!?!?!

VT Bound

2010-04-05T09:07:00.001-04:00

I got a job offer this morning, for a school in Vermont.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

An Update of Sorts

2010-03-31T13:37:00.002-04:00

Tomorrow's the big day as far as the job hunt goes. The principal from the school has called ALL of my references today so they're definitely doing their homework. After the interview I'm heading home (again) for the holiday weekend and my cousin's bridal shower (who's wedding I'm in). I don't even think I've TOLD you all about that whole thing yet, have I? Hmmm...

I mentioned my attempt at playing it "cool" with this new guy (we'll call him... Coach), so after he called me on Sunday night to check in and make sure I was rooting for Baylor (oops), I haven't called or texted him at all. (GO MEE!!!!!) Of course, I thought the package I sent him had been delivered and I hadn't heard anything and he must've thought I was a HUGE LOSER and TOTALLY TOO MUCH so he was just going to ignore me from here on out. I was on the phone with my youngest sister last night lamenting about the fact that I'm SUCH A LAME-O and as she was so nicely reminding me about the time I left a surprise package of wine glasses at ANOTHER guy's house (thanks for solidifying my CRAZINESS Kate, you really know how to make a girl feel better) I got a text from "Coach".

WHOOP, WHOOP!

He was just checking in to see how I was adjusting back in CT and at school. He mentioned that he hasn't been feeling well so he's been going to bed early to get rested for the weekend (!!!!!!) ((We're supposed to hang out)). And, I told him about my second interview.

Still no mention of the package, so jury's still out on whether or not that will send him running, SCREAMING in the other direction.

In the meantime... I've got a 5 mile run to do, one jazz class, and then I'm packing and getting organized to come home for the weekend.

So Much to Say

2010-03-30T13:20:00.002-04:00

I had two interviews while I was at home which was great timing for me. I thought I rocked the first one, and felt really great about it. The second one? Lasted fifteen minutes. Really. I drove 75 minutes for a 15 minute interview. I thought they just decided I wasn't a good fit and moved on.

Yesterday I heard back from both of them. The first one, went in a little bit of a different direction than they had originally intended but loved me. In 90+ applicants I'm in the top four. They might have one more position open and will call me if they do. They ended up going with someone with more experience (go figure) which I'm not at all surprised by because the teacher already on that team was a fuddy-duddy-oldie teacher. You know the kind I'm talking about- - wears jean jumpers, doesn't like new ideas, and is STUCK in the late 80's early 90's.

The second school, the one who's interview I thought I failed? Invited me back for a day-long site visit. I'm one of three finalists. We'll see how this goes.

The rest of my vacation was really quiet and relaxing. More so than I ever would have wanted or planned for myself, but sometimes... you don't have a choice. Jax finally texted me 10 days after he broke up with me. We've talked about a lot of things. He would ultimately like to get back together and has apologized for acting like an idiot. I'm not sure I'm ready to hop back on that bandwagon. What's the hardest is that I wouldn't have broken up with him- - I was really looking forward to spending some time together. However... now that we ARE broken up I feel like we could use this time to get settled on our own, figure some things out, and go from there.

Of course, in the meantime... of Jax not talking to me at all, I met someone. You KNEW that was coming, right!? At the same bar I met Jax- -I KNOW, I need to get out more, you don't need to tell me that. He seems like a great guy, I'm totally into him, but he's a TOTAL player which I don't need AT ALL. He took me out on a fantastic date, we hung out at the bar two other nights and he still has not kissed me. (Although, for our first date he DID suggest heading to his (and his ex-wife's) house, making dinner and chillin' in the hot tub...)

There is SO much more to say about this guy, but I'm waiting to see how things play out. I'm trying to play it cool which, you KNOW, I'm terrible at. And just in case you needed FURTHER evidence that I'm a complete PSYCHO, playing it cool means purchasing a book we discussed while on our date, writing a short note to go with it, and mailing it to his work. (TOLD YA!!!!!)

I just don't want to get into another situation where I don't get exactly what I want. I know, relationships are cooperative, you've gotta give and take, BLAH. BLAH. BLAH. I'm over that. For now. I want to be pursued. Hardcore. Do you hear that boys?!?! It's. ALL. ABOUT. ME.

Thankyouverymuch.

Oy

2010-03-23T16:43:00.002-04:00

I've got a hot date tonight (with probably one of the biggest player's in my county- - I know.), and an ex-boyfriend who'd like to revisit his decision...

Hmmmm.

Ouch

2010-03-18T10:41:00.002-04:00

It's been a long almost-week. I knew that things were a little off with Jax and I but I figured two solid weeks at home, hanging out and spending time together would be good.

Apparently not.

It's just been so weird and awkward and honestly, really disappointing. It's not that I thought he and I were necessarily meant to be TOGETHER. FOREVER. But it was really nice to have someone to make plans with and hang out with whenever I was home. To have someone who cared (well, who I THOUGHT cared) about me, my well being, and my plans.

I was totally blindsided and really hurt by the way things turned out. Initially I held off with him because I didn't want to do a long-distance relationship (remember? BEEN THERE. DONE THAT.) but he spent four months convincing me and showing me that he would be the best boyfriend ever. I don't take having a boyfriend lightly. I finally said yes, and it lasted 10 weeks. I could die over that. It's so embarrassing.

Not only that but we hang out at the SAME BAR. Now? He completely ignores me. It is so strange. I could see if I totally hurt him and he hated me, but he really doesn't have any reason to make things awkward. I just hate that he (obviously) didn't care enough about me or my feelings to handle things differently.

I'm not perfect, I know that, but it is so frustrating to be continuously disappointed by people.

Not only that but we had some long-term plans that I was looking forward to... ayyyyiyii. This blows.

Of course, I know- I'll better off, it wasn't meant to be, etc, etc, etc. Still. For the time being? This sucks.

I love having three sisters and I love being the oldest, but it's times like these that make me wish I had an older brother. I know if I did, they would throw down and at least make a statement. Somehow it's just not the same if your parents or a younger sister does it...

In the meantime I'm working on keeping busy...

Saw it Coming...

2010-03-13T07:53:00.003-05:00

Jax broke up with me last night.

At the bar.

That's all I have to say about that.

Clarification

2010-03-11T21:00:00.002-05:00

It has come to my attention (Thanks to my aunt, Jane) that you may have assumed I censored our neighbor's email address and put in a generic "pleasekeepmeposted@gmail.com".

This is NOT the case.

pleasekeepmeposted@gmail.com is the email address she gave us.

I wish I was joking.

Won't You Be My Neighbor?

2010-03-09T20:29:00.002-05:00

I know I've told you about the drama with our neighbors. It's hard to fully explain but we received that rude note about the parking. I was going to ignore it but my sister doesn't handle things quite so...easily as I do. She wrote a note back saying that we'd never want to put anyone in danger and if there are certain times they NEED the front spot we'd be happy to oblige.

Cut to last Thursday.

I opened the mailbox and saw just one note in there with our names written on the front. I almost didn't take it. It was after a long day of conferences, I had to babysit in twenty minutes and I just didn't have it in me emotionally to get riled up about anything.

I should have stuck with that plan.

I was on the phone with my mom so I grabbed the note, got in my car and opened it to read it to her.

Hi Guys,

Thanks for the nice letter, sorry it took so long for response. Just FYI none of us should use the fence so it is great that we can share it. C and I have been double parking for 10 years and you can imagine how annoying it could become. Maybe we could talk about what days work for everyone. (Me: "Wow, Mom, I think she's getting nicer. Maybe M's note worked!) If you want we can set a date/time and go over it. You could come over for a glass of wine. Whatever works for you. We are happy to live next to you, you seem kind and flexible. YEAH! (Me: "Uhhh, Mom? I don't think she's being nice...) My email is pleasekeepmeposted@gmail.com.

Best,
J

Uhhhh...WHAT?!?!?

I CANNOT BELIEVE how snarky and sarcastic that note was. I vetoed my sister and we completely ignored it/her. Whenever I see them now I pretend I don't.

BUT. IT GETS BETTER.

I babysat for the entire weekend so Friday afternoon I threw my overnight bag in the car and headed out. My sister came to join me Friday evening to have dinner, do some laundry and keep me company. She came back Saturday morning at 8am and THEY WERE PARKED ON OUR SIDE.

ON OUR SIDE.

AFTER BEING LITTLE POOTERS ABOUT THE PARKING.

THEY WERE ON OUR SIDE.

The husband happened to be outside and said to my sister, "Ohhh, well, my wife saw you put bags in your cars so we figured you were gone for the weekend."

Uhhhh. NO. WE'RE NOT. WE'RE AROUND. YOU PSYCHO LITTLE PARKING CREEPS.

*********
My posting has been lame-@$$ recently. I apologize. I'm applying for EVERY job I possibly can and EVERY JOB has an additional two essays that are required when submitting an application. I've written more in the past two weeks than I have throughout all of graduate school and when applying to college. It's overwhelming and makes for ZERO time over here in blog land. I promise, I'll be better as soon as I can.

Monday, Monday

2010-03-01T07:27:00.003-05:00

Ohhh Monday, we meet again. Luckily for me, this is a (NOTHER!) short week due to conferences. I think we've probably worked two five-day weeks since the first of the year. It's pretty freakin' spectacular. Way better than my old job when we would get Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's Day and the 4th of July.

Teaching? Rocks.

I was all set to give my Marathon Monday update today, but nikeplus.com doesn't seem to be WORKING. I log on and NONE OF MY RUNS ARE SAVED so... I'm in FREAK OUT MODE. I've been saving my runs on that thing since December of 2006. That's LOT of running. I was almost through the green zone and there's no way in hell I'm starting over. Those techies at Nike better get things fixed this morning.

I'm ready to cut a Bia.

Things with Jax are (slightly) better. He's still kind of bugging me, but I'm trying to ignore it. He has just not been attentive enough lately. I know I sound like a loser, but...I'm entitled. (I think.) He better adjust his attitude before I come home for spring break, that's all I have to say.

The weekend was quiet which was awesome but I've found myself getting bored more easily. I'm usually so busy I'm never bored. I think I'm still adjusting to being done grad school and panicked about not having a job yet. I need one of those. You know, a J-O-B. Like BAD.

Cropped

2010-02-26T12:16:00.004-05:00

I think I've mentioned that things with Jax have been "off" recently. He claims they're not and everything's fine. I claim woman's intuition and I'm always right. (I think.)

We didn't talk much yesterday so I called him before I went to bed and he was down at the bar having a couple drinks with some friends. I didn't even bring up anything- -just said I was going to bed and to have fun- - he filled me in on some local gossip and that was it.

He got home around 11 and texted me that he was in and heading to bed. Great. I rolled over and fell back asleep.

At 5:15 this morning my phone rang- - SNOW DAY! Which, for normal people would mean-- roll over and fall back asleep. For me? It means fling those covers back and hit the floor with both feet! I got up, made tea, turned on the weather, and opened my computer to check my email/facebook.

Jax had some new notification on my feed and... a new profile picture. Not really a big deal except it's the SAME PICTURE he had before BUT I'M NO LONGER IN IT.

I GOT CROPPED OUT OF A PROFILE PIC ON FACEBOOK.

I feel like I'm in middle school, getting all upset about facebook and all, but the reality is... I'm pissed. You can't crop your girlfriend out of your pic. He's never even put up his own picture, he's always told me which one he wanted and I've done it- -he's new to the whole technology thing and it's just been easier that way.

For Mr. (non)Technosmartypants this was (to me) a pretty bold move.

Diet Coke

2010-02-25T11:48:00.001-05:00

I know, it's a habit I should quit. But I *love* it. I just cracked a can open and am sitting at my desk listening to the carbonation bubbles.

It's sick, I know, but that sound makes me incredibly happy.

Hurry Up and Wait

2010-02-23T13:34:00.002-05:00

Being at a crossroads is never easy. I feel like I've been at one since finishing grad school. I know I will finish out the year at my current job but in the meantime have been on the LOOKOUT for a head teaching position.

So far I've applied for 11 jobs (1 in MA, 2 in CT, 8 in VT) and I just want to GET ONE OF THEM. Actually, I don't even. I'm hoping a job opens in my home county in VT, but I'm not holding my breathe.

It's such an awkward place to be.

I think I'll be moving home, to VT, but still need a job there and I'd like to fast forward the next three months so I KNOW what I'll be doing. I am a total Type A, planner by nature and not knowing what's coming is KILL-ING me.

If I had a job I feel like I could relax and enjoy the next few months here. I also need to find a summer job and that is directly dependent on where I'll be living come September.

All of these two-year stints are killing me. I'm ready to find a place, immerse myself in the community there, and get started with the rest of my life.

MARATHON MONDAY

2010-02-22T14:03:00.002-05:00

It's Monday b*tches and I've got the marathon update. M-1; Every other Monday-3.
Here's the update

T-4miles- 31:16- 7:15/mile
W- 7 miles- 58:05-7:50/mile
Th- 4 miles- only managed 3- 22:18-7:25/mile
F- 14m- 1:56:32- 8:09/mile

I really liked getting the long run over with on Friday. We have time after school to get it in before it gets too dark and this way, especially because I had to teach Jazz on Saturday morning, I can plan some other things on the weekends.

I was NERVOUS for those 14 miles, but they went surprisingly well. A few miles were REALLY hard and it was windy. I really slowed down at the end which makes me wonder if I need to start running with water/snacks. I've never run with water or snacks before but I think I need to start practicing. Getting through 26.2 miles without some food might make me TIRED.
*********************************************
I've decided to give up shopping, going out to eat, and dessert for Lent. I know I'm a little late, but I hope that I can stick to it. With at least two (maybe three) weddings this summer, I've got to GET SKINNY.

Measuring Up

2010-02-21T09:21:00.002-05:00

My cousin is getting married in July and I am one of her (11) bridesmaids. She sent us a link to the dress (LOVE IT!) ((Really.)) a couple of weeks ago with the instructions that we had to get measured locally and call our measurements into her bridal shop with our payment information.

I had a few hours yesterday afternoon and I remembered that I still had to go get measured. I called a local bridal shop and stopped by on my way to babysit. To order the dress we only needed our bust and hips measured so I told the woman that and away she went measuring.

After she finished measuring she says, "Okay! All set! I go check in 'da back for dat designer's size chart and let you know which size you are."

Great.

While I've never been measured at a bridal shop, with all of the working out I do I HAVE been measured multiple times for various exercise activities. I (thought I) knew roughly where I'd fall measurement and size wise.

After about 10 minutes she came back and hands me a piece of paper, "okay! These are your measurments!"

I looked down at the paper

bust- 37 1/2
hips- 41 1/2

size 12-14

WHAT?!?!?!??!?!?!!??!?!

THIRTY SEVEN AND A HALF INCH BUST?!?!??! REALLY?!?!??!??! I HAVE NEVER had a 37 1/2" BUST! EVER! Either my boobs have grown IMMENSELY or something is amiss.

AND... 41 1/2" hips? Well, I can't really say anything about that.

My theme song IS Baby Got Back.

But a size 12-14. I am in NO WAY petite or small-boned or any of those other "tiny girl" nicknames but honestly, I'm USUALLY a size 6 or 8 in dresses. I cannot believe I'll be a 12-14 for the bridesmaid dress.

I called Jax as soon as I got in the car and started the conversation by saying, "omigod! So I just got measured for my bridesmaid dress" and he interrupts, "and, let me guess. You're smaller than you were before because of all of the working out you're doing."

"Uhhhhh, NO!!!!!!!!!!!"

I was going to try to give up dessert for Lent and then decided to give up shopping but it looks like I'll be giving up shopping AND dessert. I cannot believe this.

Egg Salad

2010-02-20T15:20:00.003-05:00

I am not a fan of "salads". I love green salads but pasta salad, tuna noodle, potato and egg salad? Notsomuch. I can handle chicken salad if it's made by someone in my family and has a little crunch to it like celery or grapes.

My mom and sisters though? LOVE potato and egg salad.

My sister came home this morning after taking a test and she was hungry so... she was craving some egg salad.

(WHO CRAVES EGG SALAD?!?!?!?!)

I think egg salad smells like farts. It's disgusting and I can't enjoy it not even a LITTLE bit.

Not only did she eat it WARM, freshly made (warm egg salad=puking in my mouth). She put the leftovers in the fridge UNCOVERED.

I just opened the fridge to retrieve a diet coke. Instead? I got a whiff of smelly egg salad/fart.

Sick.

It's 5:30 Saturday Morning

2010-02-20T05:29:00.003-05:00

what are YOU doing? Call me crazy, but I wish I were SLEEPING. You'd think those 14 miles yesterday would have tuckered me right out. Apparently not. Of course, I was exhausted last night and headed to bed early, but at 3:40am I was WIDE AWAKE. I made myself lay in bed until 4:30 but I've been up since then...watching VH1, (I didn't know this channel even existed anymore. I live in a cave), learning some new jazz songs for this morning's class and enjoying waking up and not immediately squeezing my thighs into spandex before heading to the gym.

I will have to squeeze my thighs into spandex this morning, but not for another couple of hours. Miracles never cease.
*************************************************
The news has been saturated with Tiger Woods' apology and, quite frankly, I'm annoyed. Does he owe some people an apology- - certainly. He owes some people MORE than that. Does he owe an entire nation an apology?

That?

I'm not quite sure about. My sister and I were discussing it over dinner last night and we feel like he doesn't. Sure he's a major sports celebrity and many people admired him for his athletic ability but this type of transgression isn't EXACTLY uncommon in the sports world or in the political world... or AT ALL. It sucks, but it (excuse the pun) seems par for the course. He should be embarrassed and humbled and many other things but...I don't know. To me, it seems a little extreme.

And sex addiction? Is that what they're called infidelity these days? Last I heard it was called self control which- - to get to this point in his golf career- - he obviously has. Sounds to me like a couple of bad decisions and the excitement of doing something "wrong" or "different" got the best of him.
*******************************************
Finally caught up with the dvr last night and watched Grey's and Private Practice. Do any of you watch these? First of all-- Lexy, the (former) Chief and Miranda are saving Grey's in my opinion. And OHMYGOD can Addison and Sam just GET TOGETHER DAMN IT?!?!??! Pete is obviously still in love with Violet and and Addison and Sam? Well, they just seem to GO together. It's KILLING me. Not to mention that I secretly have a HUGE girl crush on Addison- I'd like to be her- and after the disaster with McDreamy... I just want her to be happy. In a weird I-know-she's-just-playing-a-character-but-I-think-it's-real-life sort of way.

Also? I could basically name my (future) children after the entire cast of Private Practice- they've got some great names going on in that show.

Addison
Sam
Peter
Violet
Cooper
Charlotte

they (I think) totally beat
Meredith
Derek
Christina
Miranda
Lexy

Alex and Sloan are great names though, they don't make the list.
*******************************************
Received another email from School Spring last night (at 9:30...?) saying that my materials have been initially viewed by a potential employer. I HAVE NOT YET received a rejection email so... either the viewer was drunk, checking their possible future employees out at 9:30 at night, and is waiting to re-check when they're sober before rejecting me OR they're super dedicated and were still in their office at 9:30 on a Friday night and felt that MAYBE just MAYBE I might me future-employee-material.

For my sanity, please pray for the latter.

From Bad to Worse

2010-02-19T10:45:00.003-05:00

I was ALREADY feeling like I SUCK AT LIFE yesterday and? The day got even worse. Really.

I use a website to apply for teaching jobs in Vermont (SchoolSpring.com). Like many other websites of it's kind, you submit resumes/applications/cover letters to open positions directly through the site. Once you submit, it sends you a confirmation email saying your information has been received and you'll be receiving another email when the employer has initially viewed your profile.

I received the confirmation email, then an hour later I received another email from School Spring saying that my application has been reviewed (!!!!!). AS I AM READING THIS EMAIL I get another email from School Spring, "Thank you for applying you have not been chosen for this position." The potential employer DELETED me as a possibility within 2 minutes of viewing my application materials.

Makes me feel GREAT about my resume/cover letter. Ugh.

I went to Jazz after school (crazy lady wasn't there) and had a great class. I was driving home, north on 95 with NO BUMPER TO BUMPER traffic (SCORE!!!!!) and I was? FEELIN' GOOD! I would get home before 6pm (gasp!), shower, and have time to do the dishes and get dinner ready before my sister came home.

I had showered and was in the middle of the dishes when I heard my phone vibrating on the coffee table. I thought about ignoring it but at the last second decided to check who it was.

OH SH*T.

It's the number of a woman I babysit for AND I'M SUPPOSED TO BE THERE RIGHT NOW!

DAMN IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I COMPLETELY forgot about babysitting.

I know you're going to start thinking that I'm a liar, but I HAVE NEVER forgotten about babysitting before. Really. I am about the most responsible and reliable person I know.

I felt TERRIBLY.

So terribly in fact, that I called it quits on the day and went to bed at 6:45.

No joke.

I slept until 6:10 this morning.

I have 14 miles to run tomorrow but I'm teaching jazz in the morning and have to babysit SOOoooo I'm thinking about running them this afternoon.

If I don't KILL THESE 14 MILES... something's GOING DOWN. I've had it with this week.

A Marathon Update

2010-02-18T10:52:00.003-05:00

Lately, I suck at life.

Examples:

1) I picked a fight with Jax Monday/Tuesday just because I was being needy and unreasonable. I am RARELY either of those two things. Really. Ask my mom. (In my defense, I didn't like his reaction/answers to my concerns/questions so it was a LITTLE legitimate.)

2)We had a snow day Tuesday and I FELL ASLEEP READING. Not only do I not nap, I NEVER fall asleep reading.

3) I ran 7 miles yesterday afternoon at 7:50/mile which, if you've been paying attention, is MUCH slower than I've been running.

4) I was on the treadmill this morning getting my 4 miles in and HAD TO STOP AT 3. I TURNED THE TREADMILL OFF AND GOT OFF AFTER THREE MILES. I WAS SUPPOSED TO RUN 4! WHAT THE EFFFF?!?!?!?

I am NOT a quitter. I promise. I thought this week would be easier because I didn't have personal training boxing and regular boxing on Monday and didn't go to regular boxing on Wednesday. My body isn't working as hard as it usually is. I do NOT know why those 4 miles eluded me today but I am NOT happy about it. I wonder if I tried to do too much in too short a period of time. I ran from 3-4 taught jazz from 6-7 and was on the treadmill at 5:30am... maybe my body really couldn't handle it?

I don't know, but I'm going to need some motivation because getting off the treadmill early? Is NOT something I'd like to have happen again. It is totally discouraging and I feel like an out-of-shape loser.

I better kick those 14 mile's ass on Saturday.

Catholic Guilt

2010-02-18T10:33:00.002-05:00

Yesterday was Ash Wednesday.

I only know this because I teach Jazzercise two times per week in the basement of a church.

I was born and raised Catholic and went to church regularly growing up.

I am ashamed to admit that I did not know it was Ash Wednesday.

There has been a big push around southwestern CT to get more Catholics to repent this season which I think has catholicism on my brain. I don't go to church regularly anymore but have thought a lot about it lately. (That doesn't count, I know.) I was feeling like I needed to refocus my religion and maybe start going to church again. I have NO idea why I've been feeling this way, but since last fall, I've been thinking about it. Maybe it's feeling like I'm lacking something greater in my life, or maybe it's all of this wedding talk and me wondering if getting married in a church is important to me or not...

Cut to two nights ago. I couldn't fall asleep because I had SEVERELY burnt my toast and my whole apartment REEKED. Seriously, it smelled so bad it was interfering with my sleep schedule. I tossed. I turned. I read. I checked my email. I lied there. I envisioned. I breathed. I counted sheep. Then? I decided that I would start reciting my prayers. I started with the Lord's Prayer...

Our Father, who art in Heaven,
hallowed be thy name,
thy kingdom come, thy will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven...

oh shit...

on earth as it is in heaven...

give us our daily bread
forgive us for trespassing...

No, No...

Our father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heave. Give us this day our daily bread and pray for sinners now and at the hour of our death. Am- - DAMN IT!

Am I confusing this with the Hail Mary?

Hail Mary, full of grace, the lord is with thee, blessed are thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb Jesus, Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at.. DAMN IT! I DID! I DID! I'm creating a mix of the Lord's Prayer and Hail Mary! JEEEEZ!

I must have finally fallen asleep but...

are you ready for this?

I had to GOOGLE the Lord's Prayer yesterday morning JUST TO REMEMBER IT.

I am happy to report that I can (now) recite the Lord's Prayer with no great mis-haps.

There will be at least ONE MORE catholic repenting this season. I'm going to have to go to confession and 'fess up that I...FORGOT. THE. LORD'S. PRAYER.

Cue Please ;)

2010-02-17T13:39:00.002-05:00

Was the email Re: in my inbox this morning.

Here's the email:

Hi M.. just wanted to let you know that last night that woman with the curly hair who used to be a fitness instructor was in my class. I'm cueing like normal explaining all the moves, then started to tell a little story about my trip last week, and she yelled out "CUE PLEASE!!"

I wanted to smack her! Just wanted you to know that you weren't alone ;)

Have a good day!

Happy Anniversary

2010-02-16T12:07:00.002-05:00

Today is my three year Jazzerversary! I cannot believe it's been THREE YEARS now! Whoa. I celebrated by passing my annual monitoring last night. Go me.

The Weekend

2010-02-16T07:35:00.003-05:00

I really should write about my weekend in a series of posts because there's THAT much to say, but I usually forget to write the other ones so I'm going for one longer/long-winded post this morning.
*****************************************************************************************
First of all, it's a snow day here in southwestern CT. WOOP, WOOP! It would have been nice to know this YESTERDAY so I could have stayed in Vermont, but... oh well. I wake up so early to work out in the mornings that I always miss the notification call. This morning was no different, my sister and I were on mile one on the treadmill when our school scrolled across the bottom of the screen- - CLOSED. Damn it. I could have slept in! Of course, this morning I dreamed that we woke up at 4:50am and it was LIGHT outside and WARM! And we could run OUTSIDE for our 4 mile run! And we did! In my dream, we ran four miles.

Then I woke up to 3inches of snow and had to run 4 miles AGAIN. I've GOT to stop dreaming about running. I don't even really LIKE running, it's more of a nightmare.

As I sit here and type this my sister is taking advantage of the extra time and working on a sign language course she's taking online. Picture this:

My sister (you don't know her, but just picture a 105lb, dirtyblonde in UVM sweatpants and a college squash long-sleeved tee, with ipod headphones hooked up to her imac)
sitting on the couch
waving her hands around like a crazy person.

Apparently she's "signing" but I'm not sure I believe she's making sense.
******************************************************************************************
On to the weekend!

We arrived home Friday evening and my parents had dinner all ready for us. Jax met us and we had a great carb-filled meal in preparation of our longer run Saturday morning.

Saturday night my parents, sister, Jax and I went to American Flatbread for an early dinner and then met my aunt and uncle out for margaritas at Madera's. After that we went to our favorite bar, took over the juke box and sang into our beer bottles for a couple of hours.

Really, that's what we do. It's super (we think) fun.

After the bar I headed back to Jax's and I was so excited to give him his Valentine's day present I asked if I could give it to him early. He was, of course, okay with that and he LOVES LOVES LOVES his new itouch. I'm slowly bringing him to the 21st century. He got his first computer for Christmas, and now I have him on Skype and online banking. Progress.

His mom made me a tote for Valentine's Day (how nice is that!?!?!) so he put his presents in there. He got me a pink Under Armor running shirt, white NorthFace gloves, and a matching wine chiller, cheeseboard set. I loved everything. He is so cute.

Sunday morning I was up early playing on the new itouch and getting caught up on my email, Jax slept in but when he woke up he went out to get the paper, made eggs, bacon and toast for breakfast and we had a relaxing morning.

Sunday night, to celebrate Valentine's Day, Jax made reservations at Pauline's. Neither one of us had ever been there but WE HAD THE BEST MEAL EVER! We started with a bottle of cabernet then decided to do the "Valentine's Day Special" which was a four-course meal so... we got a champagne toast, salad (me: beet, him:ceasar), appetizers (me: VT cheese plate, him:oysters), dinner (me: maple roasted duck, him: rack of lamb) and dessert (me: apple, pear, cranberry crisp, him: bananas foster). We had a room to ourselves and dinner took about 90minutes. It was totally awesome.
******************************************************************************************

Everything with Jax is going so well. He is so easy-going and sweet. It's been so much fun...

Marathon TUESDAY

2010-02-16T07:21:00.002-05:00

Yea yea, I admit it. I'm a Marathon Monday FAILURE, Marathon TUESDAY it is. Last week was a tapering week before upping the mileage this week.

T- 3m- 23:02/7:10mile
W-6m-7:40/mile- we had a snow day on Wednesday so we ran in TONS of snow outside. It was slow-going, but fun!
T-3m- 23:15/7:14/mile
S- 9m- 7:40/mile. The long run this weekend was done in VT and let me tell you... those hills kicked my BUTT. I didn't realize how FLAT it was around CT. My glutes are still letting me know... OIY!

This week we're running 4;7;4;14. 14 miles... will be the longest I've EVER run. I'm a little nervous!

When to Let Go

2010-02-09T12:20:00.002-05:00

My sister and I share an apartment. It's an old cape that has been split into two units- - an upstairs and a downstairs. We rent the upstairs. Our downstairs neighbors have been there for a couple of years and haven't liked us since we moved in because we have two cars.

The former tenant had ONE car.

This is a very big issue.

Our driveway is 2.5 car widths wide and 2 car lengths long. We have the left side, they have the right side.

There are a total of 4 cars to park every day.

Call me crazy, but we could fit four cars in the driveway if need be.

There is a spot out front, on the road that is two car lengths long that the Mr. from downstairs likes to park his HUGE truck in. Fine. It's really not an issue for us. Occasionally we park there if I leave much earlier than my sister and she'll be coming home after me.

When we have guests for an entire weekend I'll park my car someone else to alleviate any issues we might have.

They have complained to the landlord about us being too loud, coming in late at night with rambunctious friends, and parking crooked.

Let's just clarify that between my sister and I we have three friends TOTAL in the area. Those friends have all been over LESS than two times EACH. SEPARATELY. And never late-night (minus that ONE visit from D in October.)

My sisters and I would, normally, be great neighbors. We go to bed early, aren't wild and crazy, have normal jobs and are hardly home. On most days I leave my apartment at 6 and don't get back until 6:30 or 7:30 that night.

We don't wear shoes in the apartment so they really can't hear our footsteps, we don't listen to loud music or tv. We aren't loud talkers.

Imagine my surprise when I get this "note" in our mailbox last night,

"M & M,

If you could please have guests (overnight) park out back we would appreciate it. Sat morning our babysitting had to pull out into the road while I pulled my car out. It was dangerous for her. I know the landlord spoke to you about it. It would make our Sat. work morning much easier. Thank you.

J."

I have so many points to contend with this note I can't even begin to type them all right now but one thing's for SURE.

I AM BEYOND ANNOYED.

Marathon Monday

2010-02-09T11:34:00.003-05:00

ON TUESDAY AGAIN! GAHHHHH! I SUCK!

T- 3m- 23:42; 7:23/mile
W- 6m- 47:41; 7:33/mile
H-3m- 24:00; 7:28/mile
S- 12m-1:38:12; 7:50/mile

It's interesting that I get slower as the week progresses...I wonder what that's all about. The 12 miles actually went REALLY well. It was freezing (again) but I felt great and didn't get too fatigued.

I am still waiting for that runner's high to hit, but while I'm running sometimes I do get pretty impressed with myself.

Really.

If my inner-monologue while running could be broadcast live I'm sure it would be a HIT.

Sometimes I pretend that I'm running in the actual race and my friends and family are on the sidelines cheering and waving as I pass.

Sometimes, when I think about what I'm actually doing. Training to run 26.2 miles. AT ONCE. And think about how dedicated I've been to this goal, I'll say to myself, "you go girl! You can do ANYTHING! You run that race! Show 'em how it's done!"

And I feel like I'm on top of the world.

While I'm running in sub-zero temperatures, by myself, in southwestern Connecticut.

The power of the mind.

Good thing I never claimed to be normal...

There is No F in Way

2010-02-07T17:04:00.002-05:00

I cannot believe it.

I just received ANOTHER EMAIL asking me to sponsor someone in their upcoming challenge.

Really.

This person is a co-worker of mine.

We are not THAT friendly.

I am a Teaching Assistant.

We make less than $20,000 a year.

IN ONE OF THE MOST EXPENSIVE COUNTIES IN THE COUNTRY.

This sort of insensitive solicitation is VERY annoying.

Am I wrong here? Should I donate just a small amount? I can't TAKE IT ANYMORE!

Cue Me, Cue Me

2010-02-07T16:23:00.003-05:00

All of you know that I am a Jazzercise instructor. It is sometimes overwhelming but I love it. When I was living in VT and teaching 7x/week, I learned ALL of the new songs and had new sets every week for each time slot. Preparing for classes was where I probably focused 75% of my energy.

When I moved to CT and was in graduate school full time...well...I didn't have the time, energy or brainpower to put that much effort into class. I still taught a great class and learned new songs but I just didn't put as much effort into it as I used to. As a perfectionist and total Type A, this really bothered me but there was really nothing that I could do.

Since graduate school is over I've been getting back into the Jazz swing and I've felt great about it! However, Thursday evening's class almost set me back a ways. I was in the middle of a medium-heavy routine close to the top of the aerobic curve and one of the moves requires turning around the room to face each wall. As we all came back to face one another a woman started yelling from the back, "CUE ME! CUE ME! YOU'RE NOT CUE-ING ENOUGH! CUE ME! I CAN'T FOLLOW YOU!"

Screaming. From the back of the room.

Now, our average customer wouldn't necessarily know what "cue" meant or know that's what we do up there, but this particular customer is a former aerobics instructor.

Who apparently felt it was her right to critique my style from the back of the room.

I couldn't believe it. I know that all customers have a favorite instructor(s) and the reality is, we all have different styles but we're ALL VERY GOOD instructors. I couldn't believe that as someone who formerly taught aerobics she thought it would be appropriate to disrupt a class that way.

It's rude and unnecessary and I didn't appreciate it.

When you're paying for something like a gym membership or personal training I understand that you want to get the most for you money. I do too. It's easy to loose sight though, of the fact that the people in "charge" or on stage are normal people with families, feelings and goals.

I don't make a TON of money teaching Jazzercise, in fact, I make just enough to cover my Jazzercise expenses. It doesn't pay my bills. I have a day job. I teach because I love it and because I love (most of) my customers.

There will always be someone who doesn't appreciate everything I do and I try to push those instances from my mind, but when I work hard to put a set together over the weekend and show up ready to teach a rockin' class, it really blows when someone does something like that.

Next time I've got the mic on stage I think I'll spend a little time cue-ing good manners and appropriate behavior as well.

Yes I Can

2010-02-05T10:30:00.000-05:00

I am very much a "get-it-done-er". When there are things to do I don't waste any time thinking about or talking about HOW to do them. I simply DO them. I am a mover and a shaker by nature. I am a list-maker, a task-completer, and checker-off-er. People know this about me. Oftentimes if someone wants something accomplished they'll say, "Oh, I'll just call PreppyinVT..." I don't mind this at all, in fact, I almost like it because it gives me additional tasks to write and then check off of my list.

HOWEVER, recently I have been bombarded with donation requests. I am a very giving person and I do donate to causes that are important and close to me. What I don't like is being asked with the expectation that I am going to say yes or donate immediately. I received a text from a friend (acquaintance?) last week, "Hey M, I have a small favor to ask." I responded, "What's up?" They responded, "My brother is raising money for the penguin plunge and and would really appreciate any donation you could make. I'll email you the info." I responded, "Good for him, I'll check it out." The person emailed me the info last Friday afternoon. I briefly checked it out and got on with my weekend. Sunday morning around 10am I get a text, "Hey M, did you have a chance to check out my brother's site yet?"

Ummm...yes. I did. If I was going to donate, I probably would have the next chance I had time to look at everything. I don't need any pressure. Thanks.

Then, this morning on Facebook I had an invitation to an event from someone I went to college with. EXCEPT, it was an invitation to DONATE to an event. That I WASN'T invited to.

I'm all for using as many resources as possible to raise awareness and funds but in this age of instant communication I think everyone needs to assess who they're approaching and in what way.

CT is Making me Weak

2010-02-03T06:40:00.002-05:00

I went to bed last night with every intention of waking up and heading to boxing this morning. I got a text at 1:18am saying that my cooperating teacher had a house-emergency (exploded hot water heater) and wouldn't be in until after morning recess. On boxing days I get to school on time, but late for me, so I re-set my alarm and resigned myself to the fact that I wouldn't make it to boxing today.

At 5:30 my cell phone rang. School is delayed for 90 minutes. I can still make it to boxing. Do I?

of course not, there's about an inch of snow out there and I'd have to brush my car off.

I know, I'm disgusted with myself too.

I better get back to "Reality" and back to VT quickly. I refuse to turn into a wimpy, snow-hating, loser.

Marathon Monday

2010-02-02T11:41:00.003-05:00

or Tuesday as it's becoming...

Last week was our fourth week of training for the marathon. I cannot believe it. It is really going by so quickly. The three mile runs are getting easier and easier and almost...enjoyable?!?!?! It's CAH-RAZY.

The rundown for last week went:

T- 3m- 24:07-7:32/mile
W- 6m- 48:21- 7:40/mile
Th-3m- 23:59- 7:28/mile
S- 11m- myipodstoppedtwomilesinDAMNIT. Estimating about 8:20/mile

Last week I felt GREAT about running. Then Saturday came. I had the BEST attitude about it. It was FREEZING cold (11 degrees) so Friday afternoon my sister and I went out to get some cold-weather gear. We were prepared mentally and physically for the run. Unfortunately my ipod stopped working two miles into it. I over-layered on my top half and only had one layer on my bottom half. That? Was a mistake. Those of you who know me in real life no that, by nature, I'm a sweat-er. I think about working out and I sweat. Well...Saturday was no exception. I was sweating like crazy, my pants froze to my back, my shirt froze to my pants and my left pointer-toenail dug into my middle-toe so much it bled and stained my socks AND shoes.

I have completely blocked Saturday's run from my mind and hope that this Saturday's 13miler goes MUCH more smoothly...

Zero Progress

2010-01-29T20:30:00.002-05:00

I've been feeling pretty good about myself lately with all of my marathon training, teaching more Jazzercise than I have since I moved down here, and eating well. My clothes are fitting differently, I feel differently, and I thought I was really on my way to making some progress in the weight-loss department.

I just weighed myself for the first time since Christmas.

I'm into the fourth week of marathon training and have added 15+miles into my workout routine weekly.

I weigh EXACTLY THE SAME AS I DID AFTER THE HOLIDAYS.

This? ISNOTCOOL.

What Kind of Mom Are You?

2010-01-26T20:16:00.002-05:00

I'm not pregnant. Don't worry. I was online browsing Valentines Day ideas and came across a quiz- - What kind of Mom Are You/Will You be? The results?!?!

Classic Mom

You have impeccable, traditional tastes, a clean polished look, and amazing grace under pressure.

Famous moms like you:

Beantown

2010-01-26T19:54:00.001-05:00

Before I headed home for Christmas vacation Jax told me that he had tickets for a Celtics game for a weekend in January and asked if I would like to go with him. Like it was even a question- - now that I don’t have grad school and I live in my own apartment I can TOTALLY plan weekends like this. I obviously said yes!

Jax, being the super-considerate guy that he is, planned the weekend and it included driving to CT to pick me up and driving me back to CT at the end of the weekend. I told him that while I appreciated the sentiment- - that was TOTALLY unnecessary. I decided to take the train from CT to Boston instead of driving to meet him. I don’t know how many of you have had the opportunity to take a train before, but it was my first time and I absolutely loved it. It was about the same travel time as driving BUT it was SO EASY. There are comfortable seats, a bar/snack car, electrical outlets, plenty of storage room and NO LINES. NO SECURITY. NO WAITING. NO DELAYS OR CANCELLATIONS!

Seriously, I’m a walking advertisement for Amtrak now.

When I stepped off the train Jax was waiting for me at the end of the track. He had arrived early to check in and make sure he knew how to get to/from the station and the hotel. He took my bags and we started the two-block walk to our hotel. We stayed at the InterContinental, which was, in one word, amazing. I’m about as low-maintenance as a girl can get, really, I’d be fine at a Motel 6 or a Holiday Inn, but there IS something to say for staying in a really nice hotel. The room was gorgeous, the hotel bar was a hopping nightspot, and the concierge service was incredible.

I walked into the room to find a bouquet of flowers, a bottle of wine chilling in an ice bucket, two wine glasses on the table, a box of chocolate covered strawberries and three wrapped presents.

Really.

It was a little cliché and like a scene out of a movie, but for right now… this movie is my life and I am loving every second of it.

The three wrapped presents were a wooden box of wine opener accessories (which came in handy for our bottle of wine), and two cashmere sweaters.

I know.

I do not own, nor have I ever owned anything cashmere and Jax just cannot fathom that. So… he decided to pick out a couple to get me started.

We relaxed for a bit and then got ready to head to the Celtics game. I’ve never been to the Garden (is it still called that?!?) before so that was quite an experience and we caught an awesome game. After the game we met up with one of my best friends from college and spent the night on the town!

Saturday morning we were up surprisingly early. I had a 6-mile run to get to so while I was getting ready for that Jax asked the concierge where I should run. We got it mapped out and headed down to Boston Harbor so I could run along the Harbor Walk. It was nice to be by the water, but I think it’s called the Harbor WALK for a reason, it wasn’t the BEST for running, but it was close to the hotel, didn’t have any stop lights, and Jax could go to the aquarium while he waited for me.

It was almost noon by the time I was showered and dressed so we headed straight to Faneuil Hall for lunch. We stopped at Durgin Park- Jax had the ribs, I got the Thanksgiving sandwich then set out for an afternoon of shopping. We did WAY more shopping that I thought we would. We started around Faneuil Hall and cleaned out Gap, then headed up towards Downtown Crossing. My friend from Friday night had a new perfume that I FELL IN LOVE WITH. And… you know me… I needed it immediately.

Four hours later we walked back to the hotel saddled with shopping bags. (I momentarily forgot that I was taking a train back to CT and didn’t have ROOM for all of this STUFF! It was so much fun though, shopping in Boston, totally worth it. )

We relaxed again for a bit, Jax may or may not have passed out watching tv while I tried on all of my new purchases and then we got ready to head out- - again. We started at the bar at the InterContinental, headed to Faneuil Hall AGAIN (it was walking distance) for dinner. We went to an awesome seafood restaurant whose name escapes me now, then met up with my cousin and her best friend for another night out on the town.

Overall? It was one of the BEST weekends I’ve had in a while. Completely fun and relaxing.

Marathon Monday

2010-01-26T19:52:00.001-05:00

I know, it’s Tuesday. Apologies. Here’s my marathon update!

T- 3m- 24:12minutes; 7:32/mile. OUTSIDE! IN THE MORNING!

W- 5m-38:31; 7:39/mile. Outside!

Th-3m-24:21; 7:35/mile. Treadmill.

F- REST!

S- 6m- 47:55; 7:55- Outside on Boston Harbor!

15 and WHAT?

2010-01-22T10:47:00.002-05:00

I was watching the Thursday night line-up last night (Grey's, Private Practice) and, for those of you who watch PP- - Maya, a fifteen year old, is pregnant. I was talking with my sister as we watched it and had the realization...

if I had gotten pregnant at 15 I would have a TEN YEAR OLD CHILD RIGHT NOW. OH MY GOD. THEY WOULD BE OLDER THAN THE THIRD GRADERS THAT I TEACH. OH MY GOD.

Not that I was participating in any activities at 15 who's outcomes could be pregnancy, I wasn't. BUT STILL.

A TEN YEAR OLD CHILD. At the age of 25. IS NOT SOMETHING I'm ready for AT ALL.

It's amazing what "growing up" does. At fifteen, I probably felt grown-up, and adult, and ready to take on the world... at 25? I think my fifteen year old self was a huge baby with a lot to learn.

Happy MLK Day!

2010-01-18T13:47:00.003-05:00

It's a holiday for many of you out in the blogosphere, I hope you're enjoying it. We have a nice long weekend here in CT and since I was just home through January 3rd I wasn't SUPER anxious to get back in the car and head north this quickly. Jax, of course, was more than happy to head down here for the weekend.

We had an awesome weekend. He arrived Friday evening in time to go out for drinks and dinner, we went shopping, we went out with friends... it was so nice and relaxing.

I had asked my mom to send some things from home down with Jax so he had a bag full of goodies from her AND a surprise for our apartment:
I had asked my mom for Bed Bath and Beyond coupons so we could buy a small, roller vacuum and mentioned that to Jax, and? He bought one for us! How sweet is that?!?!?! And it was even nicer than the one we wanted!

Marathon Monday

2010-01-18T13:43:00.003-05:00

Wow. This Marathon Monday came up quick! I can't believe it's been two weeks of training already. I'm still feeling pretty good and motivated which is awesome!

T- 3miles- 25:77; 8:02/mile
W- 5 miles- 40:11, 7:46/mile
Th- 3 miles- 25:14, 7:40/mile
Sat- 9 miles- 75 minutes, 7:59/mile

This week should be relatively easy with another set of 3,5,3 miles then just 6 on Saturday!

Marathon Monday

2010-01-11T14:14:00.002-05:00

Welcome to my new weekly update- Marathon Monday!

Here's last week's totals

Tuesday- 3 miles, 5:30am, treadmill, 26min, 7:59/mile
Wednesday- 5 miles; 3:04pm, outside!, 41:39, 7:54/mile
Thursday- 3 miles, 5:30am, treadmill, 25:05, 7:55/mile
Friday- REST!
Saturday- 8 miles, 9:30am, outside!, 66:12, 7:56/mile
Sunday- cross train- boxing

It's basically the same schedule this week, but with 9 miles on Saturday!

The Art of Relaxation

2010-01-10T19:50:00.002-05:00

This weekend has been one of the most relaxing weekends I've had in *such* a long time. Friday evening my sister and I went to a Jazzercise fundraiser my center/instructors were hosting and we had so much fun. In a place where my sister and I don't have a HUGE social circle it's always nice to be a part of something larger, to be part of a community, if only for a night. Jazzercise here is SO different than my experience in Vermont it's incredible. So many people working towards the same goals... don't ever underestimate the power of that.

Yesterday I slept in and headed out for my long run of the week (updates to come on new theme day- Marathon Monday), I came in, showered, and we ran out to do some errands. I was, of course, unsuccessful in finding what I was looking for but that's okay, I need to regulate my spending anyway.

Last night we saw The Blind Side. In a word? UNBELIEVABLE. That movie IS SO GOOD. If you haven't seen it yet, GO. NOW. TONIGHT. Really, it was amazing. I got teary-eyed at least 13 times, but it's football-ish enough for guys to like too. I have since become obsessed with it- - google-ing the real story, watching the 20/20 episode about it, buying the book the movie was based on. Seriously, I can't say enough good things about it, I even watched football today just to see Michael Oher play for the Ravens.

Today I slept in (again) headed to Greenwich to do my laundry (thank god for my sister's ((ex))boyfriend's family), went to boxing, then came home, showered, got in my bathrobe and sat in my chair until 4:30. I know, I couldn't believe it either. I learned some new jazz songs, talked to some friends on the phone, and made plans for the weekend.

I have a four-day weekend coming up and Jax is coming to visit which will be fun. Of course, RC texted me today to let me know that he thought he would fly in for the weekend to hang out with me... I know. I know. The drama is endless.

I'm looking forward to heading to bed early tonight, once 5am Monday morning hits it seems like I don't stop until Friday at 3pm.

Here's to a great week!

Everything but the Kitchen Sink

2010-01-08T12:00:00.004-05:00

Pretty much sums up what Jax gifted me for Christmas. I almost died at the amount of gifts he had for me under the tree (which was pink, and purchased just for me). The way he gifted me the gifts is SO funny it deserves it's own post while simultaneously demonstrates that I'm a LITTLE... um... what's the word?

Greedy?

Yea, that's it.

Let's start at the top:

My first pair of designer jeans (Sevens). He took me out shopping and I tried on about 23 pairs.
$150 gift certificate to a local spa
Honora pearl necklace (in pink)
Honora pearl earrings (left image)
Gift basket from Bath and Body Works (Warm Vanilla Sugar)
Sandalwood Vanilla candle

and a few other things.

I still cannot believe at the thoughtfulness and generosity of his gifts for me. It was very overwhelming at the time, but I have enjoyed EVERY SINGLE gift so far. It's incredible.

Can you blame me for being SLIGHTLY influenced to make it official with him?!??!

Motivation

2010-01-08T10:45:00.001-05:00

"Now if you are going to win any battle you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do. The body will always give up. It is always tired in the morning, noon, and night. But the body is never tired if the mind is not tired."
- George S. Patton, U.S. Army General, 1912 Olympian

Trying to let my mind run my body.

Low Key Morning

2010-01-08T09:12:00.002-05:00

This morning we had a 90minute delay. I, of course, went to bed last night at 8:30 so I was WIDE awake by the time the 5:43am phone call came. I relaxed this morning nonetheless. I woke up, made some tea, sat DOWN to drink it instead of throwing it in a travel mug and rushing out the door. I made a couple of phone calls to friends (my friends love me and don't mind that I call SUPER early), brushed off the cars (including the super-b*tch neighbor who lives downstairs from us- - New Year's resolutions, WHAT!!!!!), I just took. my. time. And? It was awesome.

Today is also my rest day for working out which probably has something to do with the enjoyable morning. I didn't wake up at 5am to be at boxing or at the gym cranking out the miles on a treadmill.

I also ate 5 munchkins today which doesn't say too much for my diet. Damn it.

Tonight we have a huge Jazzercise event which my sister is accompanying me to. It's going to be a great weekend.

Happy Friday!

A Proposition

2010-01-07T13:22:00.002-05:00

Boston Guy will be on a two-week military leave from Iraq in three weeks. He facebook chatted me to see if I was interested in getting together when he drives through CT over one of the weekends. I said, of course!

His response?

"Great, I can't wait to seduce you- - if you're willing of course. Or... even if you're not. :)"

F THAT smiley face.

REALLY Boston Guy? REALLY?!??!??!?!

Creep.

The Year in Review

2010-01-05T14:13:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year!

It’s been so long, I don’t even really know where to start. The end of the year was a whirlwind and I’ve just returned to CT from two and half weeks in beautiful Vermont with my friends and family. I’m always amazed at how quickly time flies when you’re having fun. As usual, I arrived home (VT) with a list of things I wanted to accomplish while I was there, I achieved ONE of them. Not a great track record, I know. It’s easy to get caught up in errands, and plans, and friends, and family, and drinking and eating… and all of the sudden it’s a new year. I’ve got lots to share and update you with, but while I get my head around just HOW I’m going to summarize the past two months, I’ll leave you with a review of 2009:

-took 15 graduate level courses

-moved three times

-dieted for the first time in my life

-FAILED MISERABLY dieting

-went on some ridiculous blind dates

-completely ended an on-again, off-again romance with a boy from college

-spent the summer in SCHOOL

-had a whirlwind non-romance with Mr. Boston

-took three weeks in August to go home and RELAX

-watched two of my sisters graduate from their respective programs

-moved in and work with one of them

-shuffled 3 guys around

-made it official with (a new)one of them

-may be re-evaluating above decision

-FINISHED GRAD SCHOOL

My goals for 2010 are:

-talk less about people

-tell someone when I like their outfit/hair/shoes/etc

-run a marathon (May 30^th, be prepared for updates)

-read more for FUN

-get a “real” job and my own classroom (in VERMONT, fingers crossed)

An Update

2009-12-10T11:25:00.000-05:00

I have been completely remiss in updating this and I have no other excuse except- grad school is a b*tch. It’s OVER though and the lyrics keep running through my mind, “na-na-naa-na, na-na-naa-na, HEY, HEY, HEY, GOOOD BYEEEE!” I’m excited to get back into a regular workout routine, shed some of my stomach and arm flab, and start reading for pleasure again. It’s been far too long.

I am extremely sick at the moment, but those of you who know me in real life know that the way that I deal with sickness? Is to completely ignore it. I don’t have the time or patience for that BS. I’m pretty convinced I got sick from my sister. She is a germ-factory with a 0 tolerance immune system. I’ve been resisting her sickness for four months and I think my body has just had enough.

With the holidays coming up, it’s easy to become caught up in the day to day and get stuck on how someone isn’t meeting your needs or has disappointed you. I would like to encourage you to instead, think about all the ways people have pleasantly surprised you. Look to find the good in every situation, or in situations that are overall just plain bad, know that you’re not going to change it, probably… ever, and that’s okay. Don’t dwell on in through the holidays; enjoy this time with your friends and family. Stay positive.

It All Ends Abruptly

2009-12-06T16:03:00.003-05:00

Today I finished all of my remaining work for graduate school. I cannot believe it. It actually hasn't even hit me yet- - that I'm done. I won't relax until I give a final presentation on Tuesday and hand in another final assessment but the hard part is over. This is so surreal...

Barely Staying A-float

2009-12-01T11:28:00.002-05:00

Happy December. I had an awesome Thanksgiving with family and friends in gorgeous Vermont. The next two weeks hold a certification test, research presentation, and culminating assessment for me. I'll be MIA for a while.

I hate when this happens.

The Weekends are Never Boring

2009-11-14T23:53:00.000-05:00

Let me preface this post by saying that I’m watching Real Housewives of Orange County as a write this, and? THIS SH*T IS F**K*D.

I promised a post about last weekend, so here I am. I didn’t want to leave you hanging. I’m sure the anticipation was killing you.

I got home late Thursday night and stopped by Jax’s on the way to say hello. He is so sweet. He remembered that I said I loved vanilla vodka so he bought me a bottle of Stoli. AND during one of our conversations on the phone I (apparently, I have NO recollection of this) told him that I wanted a Snuggie. (I TOLD you, I don’t remember saying this.) So? He did what any other 30 year old guy would do, he bought me one. In leopard. THEN. This is where is gets REALLY good and I start thinking that I should just date this awesomely fantastic guy. THEN? When I was leaving he carried this HUGE cardboard box down to my car. I was like, Uh, WHAT is that? And he explains that he was in the liquor store the other day and saw this brand of wine. Four Sisters. He knew that I would love it, and that I’d want some and want to share it with MY sisters so? He bought a case for me. Seriously, he’s awesome.

Friday night we planned a happy hour at the bar and our friends/family in town came to hang out. It was a really awesome night and the Mic Ultra was FLOW-ING. You can guess where this is leading. The bar got crazy, Jax was there, Bartender was there, Kiwi was there…why hang out with just ONE guy at a time?!?

My sisters and I were getting wild, controlling the jukebox and ordering shots. You know that button? On the jukebox that says, “For TWO credits this song will play immediately”? Well, an Eminem lover snuck in on our playlist and CHOSE THAT OPTION FOR THE WHOLE DAMN ALBUM. After about 30 minutes of “Ima KILL YOU!” “B*TCH YOU’RE A WH*RE!” and “Daddy’s SORRY but your mom’s a SL*T!” I marched myself right over to the REAL Slim Shady and simply said, “If you change our playliiiiiist, I’ll f*ck*n’ KILL YOU!”

I’m a charmer, I know.

I was visiting with Kiwi and I could tell that Jax was getting agitated. This is why I don’t want a boyfriend. Because THEY GET JEALOUS AND I CAN’T BE MY FLIRTACIOUS SELF WITHOUT FEELING GUILTY. I’ve been very clear about this from the beginning. Kiwi and I were tearin’ it up on the dance floor and my sisters decided that they were ready to leave. I walked outside with them to make sure that everyone was good to go when Jax stormed by, walked to his car, and said, “I’m OUTTA HERE.”

Hmmmmm. Okay.

I walked over to see what was up and he insisted that he was ready to go but would like me to go home with him to “discuss” the events of the night. My sober self would have said, “thanks for the offer but I’ll be cab-ing it home with my sisters.” However, my sober self doesn’t communicate well with my drunk self so what came out was, “FINE! BUT THIS IS EXACTLY WHY I DON’T WANT ANYTHING SERIOUS AND I’M NOT STAYING OVER SO YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE TO BRING ME HOME AFTER.”

Needless to say, no discussion occurred because I passed out sitting up as soon as we walked through the door. The next morning I woke up to a text from my mother, “your coat made it home, but you didn’t.” Ummmm… great. I picked my head up from the arm of the couch and looked for Jax. Asleep in the other chair with his arms crossed. Perfect. Prime PISSED position. I woke him up, he apologized for his actions the night before without any prompting (check +), and asked if I was ready to go home. I asked if we could stop for bagels on the way, he of course obliged and handed me a bottle of diet coke from the fridge on our way out the door. I told you, he’s awesome.

We went into the bagel shop and instead of getting breakfast sandwiches for the two of us, Jax ordered a dozen bagels and grabbed a veggie and a regular cream cheese and two fountain sodas. He figured we should bring breakfast home for everyone else. (I KNOW!) Then, when we got to my house, he came in and had breakfast with all of us and reminisced about the night before. He’s a great guy.

I kind of feel like I shouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth and should just start dating him, on the other hand, I don’t want to do long-distance and I’m not POSITIVE that he’s THE ONE. You know? He couldn’t be any sweeter though. He really adores me with a seriousness that I don’t even know if my last two boyfriends had. It’s incredibly flattering and fun but it gets stressful when feelings are involved.

We’ll see what happens…

What a Weekend

2009-11-09T20:20:00.002-05:00

I can't even get over how different my life is now that I have my own apartment and I'm not bartering. In that...I actually have one. I am free to do whatever I want on the weekends and my life has ROCKED since August. Seriously, I can't get over how lucky I am. Not to mention I have the most amazing family and friends EVER.

I'd love to get into all the details of the weekend and my life, but I'm busy tonight. My portfolio is due Wednesday, my Action Research project is due in two weeks, my Culminating Experience Report is due in three weeks.

But trust me, the details are good.

And don't worry, I *promise* I'll actually write about everything. D always accuses me of saying I'm going to say something then never coming back to say it. She hasn't updated her blog since May, so... THERE!

Put Your Dukes Up

2009-11-01T17:43:00.004-05:00

I am a workout fanatic. Really. I (mostly) love working out and I'm always on the look out for something new and fun to switch up my fitness routine. I've been wanting to try kickboxing for a while and last Wednesday the opportunity presented itself.

You guys? I'm STILL sore. It was one of the HARDEST workouts I've done in a while. So, of course, I had to join the boxing gym. It's completely NOT in my budget, but just like everything else I rationalize to my advantage, I convinced myself I deserved it.

What? I DO!

I am now the proud owner of pink hand wraps, pink boxing gloves (yes, REALLY), and a date with a punching bag tomorrow morning at 6 am. Additionally? I have a personal boxing session with the man who trained Hillary Swank for Million Dollar Baby tomorrow afternoon.

I don't DO halfway.

Wish me luck!

In Comparison

2009-10-29T10:33:00.002-04:00

I've discussed my many (many, many) (boy)friends here and, just so you can see how different they really are I'm going to share two of my recent interactions with them.

Boy 1)
It's hunting season in VT and many of my friends are obsessed with hunting, more obsessed than I am with working out and eating dessert. It's intense. Many of their mornings/weekends/free time are spent in duck blinds or in boats or up in trees. I was recently on the phone with RC and he was talking about just how much he loves hunting and he said, "Seriously M, I might be broke, drive a crappy truck and live in a hellhole, but as long as I can hunt, I don't care about anything of those things. Really. I could live in a shed and be happy for the rest of my life as long as I can hunt. Well, of course, I'd like to share my shed with you too, if you're interested."

Just the proposal I've been hoping for.

Boy 2)
I opened my mailbox yesterday expected NOTHING because, unfortunately, my birthday celebrations are OVER but I saw a card addressed to me. It looked like my ex-boyfriend's writing but upon closer inspection I saw that the return address was none other than the thoughtful Jax.

I opened the envelope and pulled out a card that read, "I've only thought about you twice today" and on the inside continued, "All day and all night." Jax had written, "You said you never get anything fun mail so I thought this would be a fun surprise and, it's pretty accurate too. Hope to see you soon. xo, Jax."

The Party's OOOOVER

2009-10-25T18:32:00.003-04:00

I used to hate when my mom would sing that to me after birthdays or vacations but, sadly, the party(ies) really is over. It's been a whirlwind couple of weeks and they have been totally awesome.

Saturday morning my mom treated myself, my sister, and D to mani/pedis at our favorite spot. I've never been one for "girl time" or "girls days" but I think I may be changing my mind. Hanging out with your mom, sister and best friend? Rules.

The woman I used to live with (over the summer) and I share a birthday so Saturday evening my mother, D and I headed over there for happy hour. It was...alright. She had a few of her friends and family there and they are all very high society. I think my mother was beside herself. They can be very unwelcoming and judgmental. We lasted about 45 minutes and got the HELL out of there.

Coming to visit in Connecticut can be overwhelming for my mom. It really is completely different than where we live in Vermont and there is just a much different approach to EVERYTHING down here. She's a really great sport but sometimes the way things go here just DO NOT MESH with her.

For example: It was POURING rain Saturday evening so we decided to pay to park in a lot next to the bar we were going to in SoNo. We pulled up to attendant booth and he asked how long we were staying. He said to just leave the car.

As in- - leave the car so he can park it.

My mother has a new vehicle and did NOT like that idea at all. She hesitated for about TWO MINUTES and then, as the attendant was parking the car, walked toward the car and WATCHED EVERY MOVE. With narration for the sake of D and I.

It went something like this:

"Oh you guys. Are you WATCHING THIS? Oh my god. What's he doing? That's not going to fit there! No wonder HE wanted to drive it. OHMYGOD. IS HE BACKING IN?!?!??! Jeez. I can't believe it. I feel ridiculous watching him, but I swear to GOD IF THERE IS ONE SCRATCH ON IT WHEN WE GET IT BACK... I'm calling THE POLICE."

I felt really badly because I know how stressful it is having a new car and how you worry about it, but at the same time... I did suggest we just take my car so we don't need to worry about anything. :)

The three of us went to dinner and had the BEST time. We ordered appetizers, got drinks (got some wine in my mom) and just visited for a couple of hours. It was everything a birthday celebration should be.

I am so lucky.

It's Almost Here

2009-10-23T07:27:00.002-04:00

Seriously you guys, this week just keeps getting better. My mom arrived last night with tons of baked good for me to bring to the kids at school (my annual birthday favorite- - pumpkin muffins and HER famous chocolate chip cookies), I got the sweetest birthday gift in the mail from Jax (didn't he already get my flowers? YES! Did he still send something for my birthday?!?!? YES!!!!!), and today because my mom is here, the teacher that I work with said I should just head out during our specials and spend time with her.

I am surrounded by awesome people- - it's really incredible. (Although, my sister did find a spider while she was laying in bed this morning and did yell for me to come "Get it" but.. I WON'T GO THERE TODAY. POSITIVITY PEOPLE.)

The weekend line-up is totally awesome and I can't wait to get it started.

Woop! Woop!

Aaaand the Celebration Continues

2009-10-22T07:30:00.002-04:00

With Tuesday afternoon card and gift in the mail and evening Crumbs cupcakes (Caramel Apple and Peanut Butter Cup. YES PLEASE!), and a Patagonia gift card to get a new jacket that I've been eye-ing from my sisters. (!!!!!!!!!)

THEN my mom called and said that she was thinking about taking a ride down for the weekend! SO... my mom arrives TODAY for a weekend of birthday celebration! I have to (lamely) babysit Friday night, but other than that it's a no-holds-barred kind of weekend! We're going to head to Jazzercise Saturday morning with D, then meet up with my sister and get mani-pedis, we've got happy hour(s) and dinners planned...SHOPPING!

AND, I've got the treats all baked and ready to go for my classes.

This birthday? Totally rocks.

The Longest Celebration

2009-10-19T13:41:00.000-04:00

In five days I will turn 25 years old. I always thought by 25 I would be, in a word, settled. I’m not even close to that, but we won’t dwell on that right now. There are more exciting things to discuss like… how I’ve been celebrating my birthday for over a week now and it just keeps getting better!

It started with the flowers from Jax. Then I went to my aunt and uncles’ for happy hour and my aunt (who always goes WAY above and beyond) got me a new jacket (SO CUTE), wine chiller, wine glass identifiers, and a portable wine opener. THEN, before I headed back to Connecticut my parents gave me presents from them because I wouldn’t see them on my actual birthday. I got a new Crock Pot and recipe book, (you should SEE what I’ve been cooking while I’m at work!) mascara, new sheets, a pair of dress pants for work, 6 bottles of wine, AND THE BEST PART?!?!? My mom took me to Costco and Shaw’s and BOUGHT MY GROCERIES. Seriously, she hooked me (and my sister who lives with me) UP. It was awesome.

I never thought I’d be so excited for groceries. At 25? I guess it’s the little things.

I came back to CT and had a quiet week with plans on having a Karaoke Party with D Friday night. Just the two of us. Really. I was actually looking forward to it and had my dad ship us my karaoke mics from home. Call me crazy.

Fridays are tough for me usually though. I’m always exhausted from the week and it takes a while to get motivated. I wanted to head over to D’s house in sweats but I knew that we would probably end up going out for at least one drink so I got (half-assed) dressed. I got to D’s house, knocked on the door, and stumbled in with my mics and box of liquor (long story). As soon as I walked into the dining room, the lights came on and there were horns blowing and everyone yelled “SURPRISE!”

I’m not even kidding. My sister and D threw me a surprise party. The best part was? I was COMPLETELY surprised. I HAD NO IDEA they had been planning this for weeks. My other sister came down from NH with her boyfriend, my friend S came up from the city, my co-workers were there… It was the best night EVER. I TOTALLY felt like the star of the show. It’s so nice to feel like you have friends thinking about you and planning things for you without you even knowing. I really do have the best family and friends.

My official birthday is this Saturday and I’ve had so many celebrations thus far I’m not exactly sure WHAT the plans will be but I think that the day will start with a Jazzercise class (or two) with D and heading to get our nails done.

I'm not even 25 yet and I already love it.

Last Friday

2009-10-18T01:05:00.002-04:00

I walked into the bar like I owned the place and was abruptly stopped by the bouncer. He wanted to see my ID. Apparently HE does not know who I am. I dug my id out of my purse, flipped it up to him, and walked over to the corner of the bar.
He had a Mic Ultra waiting. Of course he did.

We visited together, with his friends, and with the bartender. Jax went out to have a cigarette (yea, I know- - don’t say it) so there was an empty bar stool next to me and between me and Jax’s friends. A twenty-something guy approached me and asked if I wanted to play pool. I politely declined saying that I was terrible. And, let’s be honest- - I only play games that I know I’ll win. Trevor (that’s his name) sat down and introduced himself. We started visiting, he asked the basics, I asked the basics… he offered to buy me a drink but Jax had just refreshed me. I pointed to the bottle and pointed to Jax. He gave me a knowing look, but he still wasn’t deterred. Jax couldn’t have cared less about the intrusion. I really admire that. He was content to sit, visit with his friends, and let me visit with my newfound friend. His friends however, acted as though I had gotten in over my head and couldn’t float, let alone pull myself out of the pool.

They interrupted, “Hey! M! I talked to your MOM last night! I told her about OUR PLANS for SUNDAY.”

“Okay,” I responded, “thanks….”

Whenever they would get up to go to the bathroom they would walk by, put their arms around me, kiss my cheek, check in… they were totally establishing themselves as “around” and as annoying as it was, I kind of appreciate that too. As much drama as I may cause at the bar and as much as I sometimes don’t know WHAT I’m doing when I’m home and with all of these guys, I am usually surrounded by people who’ve got my back, who watch out for me, and who genuinely care. It’s one of the reasons I love Vermont.

The funny thing was, Trevor was totally not my type at all. He was a real Vermonter. With a flannel shirt, Birkenstocks, and a full beard. (Hey- - it’s hunting season, almost everyone does.) But I really enjoyed my conversation with him. He was intelligent, intellectual and funny. And? He was totally into me, which, I obviously loved. He told me that I was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. (However, in this town? In this bar? In VERMONT. My competition is not exactly stiff.) Genuine flattery? Will pretty much get you everywhere with me.

After we finished our drinks, Trevor went back to hang out with his friends and I turned to face Jax and his friends. It was almost last call and I was ready to head out anyway so Jax offered to walk me to my car. I was exhausted from the 6 hour drive home and very ready for bed but when Jax asked me to stop by his house on the way home for a drink, I couldn’t say no. I don’t know why- - if I wanted to spend more time with him, if I was feeling guilty about Trevor or if I just wasn’t quite ready for the night to end, but I said yes.

We walked up the wooden steps and into his kitchen. He told me to make myself at home in the living room while he poured our glasses of wine. I heard his footsteps coming down the hallway and swung my feet to the floor so there was room on the couch for him. I glanced up at him through the doorway and was surprised to see that he wasn’t carrying wine glasses. Instead? I saw this:

He isn’t going to see me on my birthday and wanted to make sure to celebrate when he saw me. This could be one of the sweetest things someone I WASN’T officially dating has done for me.

AHHHHHHH

2009-10-14T13:52:00.001-04:00

My computer has been acting strange lately and, today when I turned it to, I noticed that ALL OF MY INTERNET HISTORY IS GONE. AND?!?!?!?! ALL OF MY BOOKMARKS ARE GONE!

This is NOT good news.

So... I plead with you. If you read this- - and you're not a follower, please leave the link to your blog and I can start rebuilding my favorites.

Thanks!

2009-10-11T11:43:00.001-04:00

I am heading home this weekend for what is sure to be a jam-packed couple of days. My favorite bar has been closed for a month (nasty law suit pending) and tonight? It’s opening back up. I’m obviously meeting friends there for a few drinks. Of course, two of The Boys will be there as well. One? I have plans to go hiking with tomorrow and really, is very definitely in the friend zone. The other? Wouldn’t return any of my phone calls all week because, and I quote, “It seems like you want to be my girlfriend and I don’t want a girlfriend. I don’t want to deal with any of that stuff right now.”

?????????????

I want to be his GIRLFRIEND?!?!?!?!??! PUHLEEEEZE! He’s obviously living in a dream world. Just to clarify, I don’t want to be his girlfriend. I think he’s just forgetting that we, before he decided to like me, were ACTUALLY friends. Friends call each other sometime. Friends care about each other. So… seeing him tonight will be interesting. I’m not exactly sure how it will go over but chances are I’ll have a Mic Ultra or vanilla vodka and diet coke in hand so I don’t really care.

And Jax. Oh Jax. He couldn’t be any sweeter, and nicer, really, any more perfect except for the fact that he’s just… a little boring. He doesn’t bring much to the table in terms of conversation, which is so difficult for a chatterbox like myself. I mean, it’s not as though I’m lacking conversation topics it’s just that he doesn’t really bring up any of his own. Other than that though- - he’s fantastic. Really. He’s kind of everything I would want in a boyfriend minus that one (and maybe two other) pieces. We’ll see how this one plays out, but for right now- - I’m playing it pretty cool.

Happy Fall!

Letting Go: a Lesson in Forgiving and Forgetting

2009-10-05T21:23:00.003-04:00

I had a bit of a trying weekend and, a much younger me, probably would still be reeling from it today. I'd be dwelling on the details, replaying it in my mind, and holding a grudge. I'd be bitter and looking for or hoping for revenge. I'd want apologies. Many apologies.

However?

I'm not my younger me.

I've grown up, I've gained perspective and I've learned forgiveness in the true sense of the word.

People make mistakes.

They have bad nights.

They say things they don't mean.

Did it hurt at the time? More than I'll probably ever be able to articulate. Still, I'm glad I've learned to forgive and forget and to move forward. I'm better off for it. I may not always make the right decision, and I still feel like a kid on occassion, but sometimes, growing up is so worth it.

It's All in the Approach

2009-10-01T21:17:00.000-04:00

Happy October! October is, absolutely, my favorite month out of the entire year. (Although, August is becoming a close second.) Everyone says it’s because it’s my birthday month (woop woop!) which, it may be, but there’s something about October that just seems… so special. It finally starts to feel like fall, daylight savings time, the leaves change, apple picking, pumpkin patches, socks, quilted jackets…I could go on and on. I love everything about it.

My birthday is at the end of the month and? I will be turning twenty-five years old. I’m trying not to dwell on the fact that I’m now as old as well, when I was 10 I thought that by age 22 you. Are. OLD. And INDEPENDENT. And a REAL LIVE ADULT. And… well? I still kind of feel like a kid. What’s up with that? Do you ever stop feeling like a kid?

I was talking on the phone with my mom this morning and we were discussing possible plans for my birthday celebration. I said something to the effect of, “Oh, gosh. It doesn’t matter. We don’t need to make a big deal.” And my mom says, “Well, it’s kind of a big one. 25?!? God, I was married by the time I was 25.”

…

Yes. Thanks for reminding me. Believe me, I would like nothing more than to be married right now. I love my social life and I’ve had more fun in the past year than I had in all four years of college, but really? I would love to be moving towards that next step in my life.

Real story? I don’t even have a boyfriend.

I know that I’m still young and have plenty of time to find someone but sometimes I wonder if I just need to rethink what I want…

Dr. Phil DID say today- - you can open your mind to new ideas without lowering your standards.

Maybe I’ll try that.

I'm a Slacker Baby

2009-09-29T22:08:00.003-04:00

I had THE. MOST. RELAXING. STRESS-FREE. weekend I've had in a long time. Jax was here visiting and we just, basically chilled for 48 hours. I would love to tell you all about it, but? I am getting observed tomorrow for the first time and I've got to get my lesson plans ready to go.

Sorry.

Oh My God, Becky? Look at THAT Butt

2009-09-23T21:36:00.004-04:00

I know, the sister stories are getting a little old. Some of you have expressed concern that she might read this blog? I assure you, my sister has ZERO interest in my blog. She doesn't even find me THAT funny in real life (I know, I can't imagine either) she wouldn't waste her time reading my nonfunniness in her free time. Trust me.

Last week my sister borrowed one of my dresses. I don't mind sharing my clothes at all, it looked great on her, which- - quite frankly- - I was shocked about because, let's remember. She's a 00 and barely breaks 100 SOAKING WET.

We always choose our outfits the night before. It really suits our TOTAL TYPE A personalities well and saves time in the morning. So... last night she comes prancing out of the bedroom in another one of my dresses. I didn't KNOW she was in there trying my clothes on, but being the sweet, patient, EASYGOING, older sister that I am, I say,

"Wow! M! That looks great!"

And she turned to the left.

Turned to the right.

Smoothed the skirt.

Checked her babelicious self out in the full-length.

I continued, "and it's supposed to be warm tomorrow! So that's perfect!"

She turned towards me.

Crinkled her nose. And says, "Oh, GOD. I would NEVER wear this to school! I mean... look at it! It's so... BIG!"

She takes her little witch fingers and pulls at the cotton top, "I mean, it's like... so SAGGY. I could NEVER wear this to school. It's too LOOSE. I mean..." she turns sideways and fluffs up the "loose" fabric, "it's just. TOO BIG. Don't you THINK!??! It's TOO BIG for school?!? I could NEVER wear this to school! Look at it! I mean, it's just kind of HANGS off of me. I was thinking that I could wear it Friday. To the casino."

I really was at a loss for words, so I simply said, "Oh, M! Of course! That will be perfect for the casino..." I hear they LIKE. BIG. BAGGY. SAGGY. Dresses there!

Her response? "Yea... maybe. Or I could just wear jeans and a t-shirt. That's really, my thing anyway."

Oh... jeans a t-shirt? Of course. Because WHY ELSE WOULD YOU TRY ON MY DRESS THAT'S QUITE OBVIOUSLY TOOOOOOO BIG FOR YOU!?!?!??! SO YOU COULD WEAR JEANS AND A T SHIRT!?!??!?!

Apparently.

A word for the wise to any skinny girls out there reading this. When your friends/sisters/coworkers graciously share their clothes with you. Don't make any comments about how ill they fit.

k?thanksbye.

smooches,
The FatAss Older Sister

When She Says Jump I Say, "How High"

2009-09-22T13:50:00.004-04:00

I went to bed a little grumpy thinking, "Hey! Tomorrow's a new day! Things will look up!

This morning? Was a disaster. I'm innocently straightening my hair in the bathroom when I hear, "M...mgpurd jdpudhd, gudhs."

"What? I can't hear you!" I responded.

Sister: "There's a SPIDER in HERE and I need HELP. I STILL can't SEE. My EYES AREN'T ADJUSTED YET."

Me: "Okay." I pick up some tissues and head into the bedroom. "Where is it?"

Her: Standing on the bed with shoes on her hands. "Right THERE."

And... there it is. All 2" and 8 legs of it. It's sick.

Me: "Okay..." I kneel down to get closer to the spider that is on the floor and my sister hands me a boot. The spider, however, is too close to the wall/corner for me to make a successful WHACK.

We push the bed over, move the nightstand and my sister hands me a bottle of windex to spray it. I'm armed with windex and the boot and lean closer.

SPRAY SPRAY SPRAY!

The spider takes OFF RUNNING! AND JUMPING! AND ZIGZAGGING TRYING TO FAKE ME OUT. There's a FRENZY in the bedroom with me hovering over the spider with a boot and windex and my sister, standing on the bed, yelling, "GET IT! GET IT!"

It stops. IN THE CORNER.

Damn it.

I asked my sister to get me a cup. A place the cup around the spider and drag it out into the middle of the floor so I can have more room to work. The spider, not liking this in the least, starts CRAWLING UP the GLASS and JUMPING AGAINST IT. I'm NOT even kidding... I could feel the vibrations from it jumping. Again. sick.

I lift the edge of the cup up EVER SO SLIGHTLY to see if it's going to move.

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" My sister screams.

I freak out, push the cup down and look up, "WHAT?!?!!?"

Her: "THERE'S ANOTHER ONE!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

I look to where she's pointing. There is... a MAYBE pinkie fingernail sized spider on the wall. Personally, I would have left it. My sister? No way. Takes a boot to that thing like it's her job and SMEARS it on the wall. No joke. She SMEARED a spider on the wall. I look at her, totally annoyed and she responds, "Yea. That's just what I DO. I can clean it later if its bugging you that much."

Bugging me? Psssshaw! I *love* spider guts on the wall.

I don't even respond because if I did? I would have kicked her ass right there before school.

Now we have spider guts on the wall and Mt. Everest of a spider underneath the cup. Good morning, it's my lucky freakin' day.

I, once again, slowly tip the cup up and expose the spider enough for me to WHACK it. I did and it curled into a ball. I hit it again. Was that enough for my deranged sister? Of course not.

She starts yelling directions:

"You've got to MUSH IT! MUSH IT! WIPE IT! TWIST THE BOOT. IT'S NOT DEAD UNTIL THE BODY COMES APART AND THE LEGS FALL OFF! IT'S JUST FAKING YOU OUT! GET IT! GET IT! RUB IT IN! RUB IT IN!"

When the spider was dead enough for her liking she instructed me to pick it up and flush it down the toilet.

Then, she hands me a bottle of spider spray my Dad had sent and says, "I read the directions. It looks easy enough."

I just looked at her.

THEN. THEN. On the WAY TO SCHOOL. She looks over at me and says, "Yea, are you Grumpy today or something? What's your deal?!?"

She was serious.

I had no words.

I'm Annoyed

2009-09-21T22:02:00.003-04:00

You guys know I love my sister(s) and I really DO enjoy living with my sister. Really. I do. SOMETIMES though- - she can be a REAL PITA. You don't know her, so it will be hard to appreciate what I'm talking about here but she can be... in a word? Abrasive. (Don't EVER tell her I used THAT word specifically because she's very sensitive about it.)

Really though, sometimes she's unbearable.

Example 1:
We've had some spider issues and I was telling her one day how I had to kill one and her response?

IN a DEAD SERIOUS VOICE and LOOK.

"M. Stop right now. Seriously, STOP. I DON'T WANT TO HEAR THIS. I WILL MOVE OUT."

Over spiders? I mean...I don't like them either, but... COME ON.

Example 2:
We still don't have a couch in our place so tonight we went to look at one for sale. The futon I was looking at- - she hated. Obviously. I'm not sure where homegirl got her (upscale) taste from but it sure wasn't from Ourtown, VT. Conveniently, the people who were selling the futon ALSO had a leather pull-out couch with a matching lazy-boy for sale. For 3x as much. She *LOVED* that. Realistically, I know that it's a pretty good deal but... can't we just get a futon? Getting ANYTHING up our stairs and through our doors won't be easy. I'm looking for something easy.

Example 3:
I got in the shower and busy-little-queen-bee that she is was buzzing around the kitchen making her dinner. Well... she used the toaster oven and the microwave at the same time. Result? Blown Fuse.

Dun dun dunnnnnn.

She says, "Oh, hey, M. I think I just blew I fuse."

Me: "Okay...do we have a fuse box?"

Her: "Yea, we've got to. Obviously. You can't RENT AN APARTMENT WITHOUT A FUSE BOX."

Me- call the Landlord, ask about fusebox. He thinks it's downstairs. Gives me the downstairs tenants phone number and tells me to call them.

I call them, explain the situation and he goes to check the box in the basement, flips the switch, all is good.

EXAMPLE 3:
Later, we were talking about nothing really and I told her that we got our first cable bill and how much it was. Her reaction?

"Good GOD it can't be THAT much. I'm not PAYING THAT. FOR WIRELESS THAT DOESN'T EVEN WORK? NO. We need to CALL THEM. AND INSIST THAT THEY FIX THIS IF THEY WANT US TO PAY."

Me: "Well, the wireless really isn't their deal. They provide the cable and that's working and we did say we wanted the dvr which is an additional $10/month... I kind of expected it to be what it is."

Her: "No WAY. We have the BEST of the BEST in the city and it's only $200 and we have the BEST. The BEST internet, the BEST cable the MOST you can get. Like, you can basically watch movies. ON TV. WHENEVER you WANT. There is NO WAY THIS IS RIGHT."

Me: "Oh, okay... well, I know that you have to pay to rent the boxes from them.... I don't know. Everyone I know pays around $120 for cable and we wanted dvr so $128 doesn't seem THAT out of line....? The bill is on my desk if you'd like to see it."

Her: "Well, I'll ask J (her boyfriend) what he thinks."

10 minutes pass.

Her: "J says we shouldn't be paying more than $40 for cable."

Me: "Right... but we also have internet. And dvr."

Her: "Right, but STILL."

Her: "J wants to know who our service provider is."

I tell her but at this point? I have HAD it. I don't make the rules, I don't make the price. The only thing I know is that I CALLED THE CABLE COMPANY TO SET IT UP. I SET UP THE WIRELESS (unsuccessfully- - but still). I MET THE CABLE GUYS HERE TO LET THEM IN. If she has a HUGE problem with the bill...I think I'll let HER deal with it.

I am G.R.U.M.P.Y. tonight.

Conversations vol. WHO CARES

2009-09-21T13:37:00.001-04:00

From D- -she's a funny, funny girl.

today after school i am going to buy mums for my front step and i feel like MY mum for doing that. i am gettting old. and haggish. tomorrow is school pics, what are you wearing??!

A Checklist

2009-09-21T11:21:00.003-04:00

- Drank heavily two nights in a row (CHECK)
- Spent an entire Saturday recovering (CHECK)
-Went out to dinner in yoga pants and a t-shirt (CHECK)
-Proceeded to go to 2 bars in said outfit (CHECK)
-Stayed until closing and got followed to the car by a creepy mcCreeper (CHECK)
-Headed to Westport to shop at 3am (CHECK)
-Stopped at diner on the way for veggie omlettess, french toast, and chocolate milk (CHECK)
-Purchased Boatmen Gellar stationary at 3:32am (CHECK)
- Semi-drunk dialed one of the boys at 4am and chatted for over an hour (CHECK)
-slept until 11:24am (CHECK)

*SO* many stories from the weekend ... coming soon.

On my way out

2009-09-18T16:56:00.001-04:00

the door for the night. First a date then a work party at D's. Woop Woop. Unfortunate thing? I'm a fat@$$. FOR REAL.

Before Everything Blows Up in my Face

2009-09-16T12:11:00.003-04:00

I'm not going to lie, I'm a fun girl. Especially when I've been drinking. Because of this when I'm out, at home (for some reason this only happens in good ol' VT), I tend to attract a lot of male attention. Which would, normally, be awesome. However, when I'm at home I usually split my time between one of two bars. Are you doing the math? This means that MOST of the male attention I'm receiving comes from ONE. OF TWO. Social groups. You know, that whole bar scene can be very clique-y and mafia-like. Which, boils down to... most of the guys I hang out with at home and/or have crushes on me... are best friends. Dun. Dun. Dunnnnnn.

Most (sane) girls would run screaming from this seeing the inevitable, impeding disaster. NOT ME. Notice I said, most, sane girls. I plow straight ahead into the "Danger: ROAD CLOSED" sign. That's just how I roll.

So... I still have the boys from the summer with the same names (from Bar 1) but really only one is THAT interested and honestly? He hunts. So... well... I still don't know about that. But as far as personalities are concerned? We're a match made in heaven. Really. He's about the funniest person I hang out with. (Aside from D- - she takes the cake.)

AND NOW. From Bar 2. Orginally there was one of the owners, K, whom I've discussed here before. Then I hit on Jax that night with D (who, of course, is K's best friend). Jax and I hung out Friday night at the bar where I caught another guy's eye. (I honestly don't try and none of these guys are EXCEPTIONALLY cute- - maybe Jax- - but that's it so don't get all, "She's totally bragging and showing her stuff" on me. Cause? I'm not) Of course, new guy, we'll call him Kiwi, is friends with K AND with Jax. He called me over the weekend to do lunch, (I couldn't), called me Sunday night to see how the trip back was, and- - this is where it gets good- - called me last night to say hi.

So, cue me- - just receiving a text from Jax reading, "Hey, I just got home, I'm gonna shower and I'll call you."

I put the phone down, settle into The Biggest Loser when, 15 minutes later the phone rings.

Restricted Number.

It's Kiwi.

"Helloooooo..." I say. We start in on a ten minute conversation where he tells me that he'd love to take me out next time I'm home, etc, etc. WHEN...

Jax beeps in.

I ignore it because I'm already on the phone. We finish our coversation and hang up. I dial Jax back.

He answers, we're chatting... making plans for him to come visit next weekend, WHEN...

R from Bar 1 beeps in. I ignore it cause I'm on the phone with Jax.

You see? I'm about one text-message-to-the-wrong-person away from this whole charade ending MISERABLY. Trouble is, I like all of these guys. I wouldn't necessarily want all of them to be my boyfriend though. So, where do I go from here? I like them, and like to hang out with them, and would like to be friends regardless but I'm also not interested in leading them on or breaking any hearts.

D says I need to lay it out on the line and simply say to all of them- - "I'm dating... MANY people."

My preferred, non-confrontational method would be to get a t-shirt that says, "I date... LIBERALLY."

I kind of come from the school of thought that... well... if I DON'T know which one I want to be my boyfriend I'm entitled to hang out with all of them until I decide which one, if any, I like. Isn't that the premise of dating?

Thoughts?!?!

I was telling my mom this whole thing this morning and her words of wisdom?

"Yea M... life's a b*tch."

Thanks Mom.

Early Night Television

2009-09-15T20:00:00.001-04:00

Okay, so I don't know if I've ever told you this or not, but I'm like... seriously good at Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune. Like REALLY good. And, you know me, I'm very modest, so you know that I HAVE to be really good if I'm telling you this. Right?

RIGHT?!?!?

Anyway- - one of the puzzles on W o F tonight? Was...

Hot Commodity.

H.O.T. C.O.M.M.O.D.I.T.Y.

It was like Pat Sajak was speaking. DIRECTLY to me.