Shopping Blues

I had an unexpected day free today and thought that I would do a few errands and pick up some items that I have needed for a while,  (dress socks, work pants, dressy shirts that aren't collared).  I headed out this morning armed with my (really lame) shopping allowance and a coupon for 30% off at Gap thinking that it was going to be a *great* day.  I rarely have time for myself and I have not gone shopping at all since I've moved to Connecticut.  What?  I'm on a shopping hiatus.  I'm going to give grad school a big kick in the behind when the next two years are over.  

After circling the parking lot four times and missing three spots because some damn woman ran her truck up and OVER the curb four times in a row (I'm not even kidding) while trying to back into a spot, I found a spot and headed in.  I had 8 things to try on, went into the dressing room, put the first pair of pants on and... could have cried.  They looked terrible.  My thighs looked like they were mushed in there and the size of... I don't know...Texas?  And? I looked like a midget.  Seriously.  I'm only 5'3" but still... I was so discouraged that I walked out without trying anything else on and told myself that until I lose some weight, I am *not* allowed to go shopping.

Now, having had a few hours to reflect on this experience and my decision, I do realize that I overreacted.  A little.  But it does remind me that I am no longer teaching 7 Jazzercise classes a week and yes.  My body has changed since I stopped doing that.  I eat right, I really do but I need to find time to work out.  I love working out and love how I feel when I work out regularly.  I think I'm just struggling to find a happy medium.  In Vermont my entire life was devoted to working out and finding time to work out.  Here?  My life is devoted to work, grad school and making any extra money I possibly can babysitting to pay for next semesters classes.  I know it can be done, I've just got to make it happen.