I Don't Even Know Where to Start

This is a long one. I warned you.

We got an early start on Thursday afternoon so we made it home in time for a late dinner with the whole family. Before we even got home my mom called to tell us that she and my dad had stopped by the bar we were having my sister’s birthday party at to check in and make sure we were all set so, we decided to meet them for a drink on our way home.

The bartender who was working (also the guy who owns the bar) was the same one who professed his love to me last time I was home, asked me out to dinner, then stood me up. (Oh, I didn’t tell you that story?!?! Oops.) He has since apologized but I still gave him the cold shoulder when I first saw him. I mean, come on.

So we have our drink, head home and wait for everyone else to get there to have dinner. Dinner, was awesome. I decided to quit WW so I ate lasagna, bread, butter and had, I think….6 beers before it was all said and done. I enjoyed EVERY last bite. It was so good. Dinner was also fun because it was the first time we were all together again and there are always so many stories to tell. We laughed so hard.

Sister #2 was turning 22 at midnight and because we ate such a late dinner we headed to the bar down the street (my favorite bar) around 11:30 to have a (couple) drinks in her honor. A bunch of my friends from high school were there so I ended up closing down the bar (go figure) and hung out late-night with one of my friends.

Friday morning I was HUNGOVER but woke up to take my cousin’s three kids strawberry picking. I was feeling better by the afternoon and got my haircut (it’s totally stylish and awesome) and then got ready to head down to the bar for my sister’s birthday. I was still not feeling the best from the night before so I took it totally easy and drank water for the first two hours I was there. Then, I had that first glass of wine. That was the end for me… the rest of the night is kind of a blur and totally fuzzy but here’s what I do remember.

I went home (got a ride) around 10:30pm to have cake for the birthday. I walked in to everyone singing happy birthday to my sister and, I don’t what came over me, but I took my fork and completely DUG IN to the cake. With the candles still burning. In the middle of the song. I guess that was me, waving my middle finger at WW and saying a big “Eff You.” Of course, I wasn’t ready for the night to be over so I decided that I would head over to my friends house, only, I couldn’t drive so I had to settle for getting a ride back down to the bar we were just at. The boys dropped me off on their way downtown and I picked up right where I left off. Dancing with the bartender who blew me off last time I was home. I guess I decided to forgive him. Blame it on the wine.

I noticed this VERY cute boy sitting at the bar so I wandered over and nonchalantly told him that he, “is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen and OMIGOD, how do I not know you.” He may have just been indulging me, but he seemed TOTALLY into it. Until his cousin came over. His cousin? Is the bartender. The one who has a crush on me. The one who I went BACK to the bar to hangout with. The one who was coming home with us at the end of the night. Oops.

(This is the part that I DON’T remember so it’s totally based on other’s retelling of the evening.)

We hung out until the bar closed and I, obviously ready to head home, decide that it would be faster to walk than wait for a cab. (Me and my great ideas.) I had had too much to drink to go back to my house so the bartender called my mom and let them know I’d be staying on the couch at their place. It was POURING rain (which explains why my hair was fro’d out Saturday morning) but still, I thought it’d be fun to walk. The guys didn’t think so but they followed me anyway (will they EVER learn?) and we got ½ way to his house before his brother picked us up and drove us the rest of the way.

We walked in and I was greeted by a HUGE dog. (You know how I feel about that.) so I just laid down and immediately passed out.

(This is where I start remembering things again.)

I woke up at 8am and headed to the bathroom- - I found it on the third try and thought that it looked a little… put together to be a guy’s bathroom but I also couldn’t see anything so I just headed back to lay down. I came to again around 8:30 and realized I was still in my party dress from the night before. (Strike one.) I also realized that I had NO idea what town I was in. (Strike TWO.) I found the bartender and told him that I was going to be late for the parade party and I needed to go home right away. He said he’d be right out so I headed back to the living room and when I walked by the kitchen I noticed there was someone sitting in there.

His mother.

I’m not even kidding. (That explains the bathroom.) There I was in the SAME DRESS I had seen her in the night before, at EIGHT THIRTY IN THE MORNING, wandering around her house.

He lives with his mom and (apparently) forgot to mention that to me. (Strike THREE.) He comes out of his room and wakes his cousin up saying, “alright, we’ve got to go” I just figured he wanted company for the ride. At the same time he’s saying this, his mom says, “Oh, you’re not DRIVING, are you?” He doesn’t have a license. (I’m all OUT OF STRIKES.) Can you BELIEVE THIS?!?!??!?!?!?!?!

His cousin (the really hot one) drove me home and then, I had to deal with my family. Reminding me about my antics the night before…

This story/weekend? Gets better.

147lbs

I've recently been informed that my family (even extended) reads this blog fairly regularly. In an effort to make sure I didn't have any REALLY disparaging posts I've made it a point to read through all of my archives.

As I was doing this I came across a post from last November. I weighed 147lbs. That is what I weigh RIGHT NOW. I'm quitting WW.

I hope that it's like finding your car keys (or nice guys)... as soon as you STOP looking for them, you find them. I'm hoping that as soon as I STOP trying (and thinking about NONSTOP) to lose weight, I'll relax and have an even better attitude about it. Of course, I wouldn't mind finding a guy in the process either. :)

Wish me luck. (or at least hope that I don't turn into a pizza, donut and bagel eating machine.)

I Told you Not Eating Works

http://giulianarancic.com/Blog/2009/4/13/Giulianas-Meal-Plan/

Also?

Came to school early to hit the gym and get some work done. The gym was closed (what kind of gym closes from 2-4 every day?).

Q) What did I do?!?!?!

A) Went to the bookstore, bought two bags of trail mix and ate both of them.

God. Help. Me.

Pet Peeves

One of my biggest pet peeves are people who ask to borrow pens in class. If you BROUGHT a pen and the ink runs out, or it breaks, or explodes, fine- - I'll let you borrow one. (Although, you really SHOULD have an extra just in case.) But simply NOT BRINGING a pen to GRADUATE SCHOOL is unacceptable.

No excuses.

The Fun? It Never Ends

When you're in Grad school. Today was Day 1 of summer session II, and? I already would like to kill myself. To recap, I'm taking three courses. Teaching Math M- Th 9-1pm, Curriculum Management M, T, H, 4-7 and Literacy II M, T, H 7-10pm. The day course is way down in NY, like far down. Past the toll booth. (Hello, $2 toll every day. I knew I should have bought that speedpass when I moved.) And 'round here in CT people think traveling one town over is a day trip. I remember the first time I subbed at Jazzercise here and I introduced myself and told everyone I had just moved to the area from Vermont. Somebody yelled from the back, "Oh! From Norwalk?!? Wow!" Uhhh.... NO. Not from NORWALK the town that is THREE EXITS up on the Interstate. From VERMONT. You know, the STATE? That's about... 5 hours and three interstates NORTH? VER.MONT. I wonder how they would react if I told them that some towns in Vermont don't even have their OWN HIGH SCHOOL. The horror.

So our professor for Teaching Math is a teacher at the school (way down in NY) where our class is held and she's more than personable and very realistic but, she's got that edge. Unless you live here or are familiar with the tri-state area you may not know what "edge" I mean, and I can't describe in a way that is remotely PC, but... she's got fake (long) nails, is very Italian and is totally rockin' the Westchester/NY accent. I KNOW.

So, class starts and there's a small group of us there and the professor tells us that one of her co-workers will be joining us shortly. The door opens a while later and she greets the woman who walks in like a friend, only thing is, I'm pretty sure this woman got lost on her way to the nail salon. On her wedding day. We all know, I'm no queen of fashion (like I need to remind you about my T for L dress debacle), but seriously? She was wearing a babyblue terrycloth full tracksuit, flipflops, and had a WIDE, white, elastic headband in her hair. I thought for SURE she would have the word, "Bride" emblonazed across her butt. (I checked. She didn't.) And I guess she found what she was looking for, because she pulled up a chair and joined the group.

After Math I headed to school to get a workout in before the afternoon/evening classes. The first day of classs is always the best, because you find out everything you need to know for the semester and it's always the worst because you find out everything you need to know for the semester. I feel sick about all of the work I have to do but at least I have internet at home again and will try to get some work done every night. Even though I'm not home until 10pm usually.

Right now I'm tired, and exhausted and have some work to do... but tomorrow's a new day and guess what? I get to do it all over again. Go me.

Also, I've gained three pounds since my last weigh-in so I'm trying to lose 4lbs. BY WEDNESDAY. I never claimed to be sane. So I've been starving myself for the day (yea, yea, yea, I know. You're NOT supposed to do that. Guess what? I don't care. Fact is, people who don't eat? Lose weight. Seriously. I'll post a link that proves it.) So this morning I have some veggies, then for lunch I had a salad and some cheese sticks. Then for dinner I had some turkey slices. I was, in a few words, feeling pretty damn good about myself. Then? I came home and was starving (oh, please. You SO saw that coming) so I had some egg whites with cheese, a spoonful of Better 'N Peanut Butter, and a pudding cup. Then I had a WW sundae cup and a box of raisins. I told you, even if I wanted to be anorexic I couldn't. Believe me, I've tried.

So, that's where I'm at. The alarm is set for 5:35 so I can make it to 6:30am spinning before Math. God help me.

P.S. Have you seen those new Bing commercials? The, "What has search overload done to us?" ones? Well, I feel like I am everysingle person in those commericials. Seriously, if they taped my inner monologue every day they could have saved some big bucks on talent fees.

No Internet...

I don’t have internet at my house again, although, it’s weird this time. Both of my computers say I have full connection, but when I try to connect to the internet (open Firefox) it says, “Cannot Open Page. Check your connection.” Yea… I’m going to have to get on that. Unfortunately, I have no idea what the issue is and I hate always having an issue. Not-to-mention that not having the internet leaves me feeling completely disconnected. Hello, I have a problem.

Today was the first day in a long time that I didn’t have to go anywhere and do anything. It was busier than I was hoping, but it was relaxing too. I went to double jazz this morning, met my sister to grab lunch, and headed to the pool for the afternoon. Today was the first day without rain we’ve had in, I don’t know, 34 days. That’s a LONG time for a sun-worshiper like myself. I spent the afternoon in the chaise lounge, reading magazines and floating in the pool. It was perfect. I’m trying to enjoy every minute of this weekend because come Monday? (No, Jimmy Buffett, it won’t be alright) I’ll be in class from 9:30am-1:20pm and again from 4:20pm-9:30pm. Being a full-time graduate student, in the summer, is way more than I bargained for.

On a complete side note, I’m watching the Real Housewives NJ recap right now and how did I miss this all season?!? This drama is GOOD. I have no idea who is related to who, who to believe or who is right, but all of this debriefing is making me anxious for Monday’s Bachelorette episode. Jillian was my favorite on the Bachelor (although, I’m glad she didn’t end up with lame Jason) but she’s being a little too dramatic for me. I know it’s not an easy position to be in, but she knew what she was getting into when she signed up. All of the crying and waffling and emotion are getting a little old. Let’s move on with the show.

I saw My Sister’s Keeper tonight and, I don’t want to give anything away, but I wasn’t overly impressed. The book was so much more powerful and moving. I felt like the film really lacked punch and pizzazz. The actors were fantastic, individually, and I really loved the character of the aunt, I don’t know… meh.

I’ve decided that in an effort to motivate my weight loss I’m going to take a picture of my weight each time I weigh myself. (Good thing we’ve already established I’m psychotic.) I can’t decide if I’m going to post the pictures here or create a new blog for it, but… I’m thinking it’s going to be a WHOLE bunch of the same numbers over, and over, and over again. GAH.

I've Got Friends

In the best places. I was feeling a bit... I don't even know how to describe it... out of sorts perhaps, tonight and I called one of my very best friends to complain/get an opinion from. He said everything you would want a friend to say and completely talked me off the ledge I was standing on. It's instances like this that remind me how lucky I am to have the people that I do in my life. It's funny how things work out sometimes and how you end up being friends with the people you're friends with.

In high school, I never thought he was the one I'd be closest with now and even though we don't talk every day, or even every week, he knows me. He "gets" me. And? (Aside from actually really appreciating me and all of my ridiculousness) He always gives me a point of view that I wouldn't think of on my own and encourages me to think about the big picture.

Well, tonight I did just that. I came home, got into my pajamas and helped myself to one of the last pieces of key lime pie left in the fridge that my sister had made. Every last bite was delicious, in case you were wondering.

I can't believe it's so late either. I'm teaching jazz at 8:20 in the morning... then babysitting all day. Here's to the one weekend until July that I won't have any homework. I plan on spending every second at the pool.

Posh and Poised

She's funny. SO funny. And new to the blog world- - check her out. You will *not* be disappointed.

Posh and Poised

How My Friends tell me I'm desperate

The following is a transcript of a Facebook chat I had with a friend from college last night... it needs no further explanation.

E: Miss M!!
M: Hey!
E: how are you?!?! i was thinking about jacksonville today and how much fun we had
M: omg- I know! I want to go back
E: adn that its been forever since i have seen you....
M: (without P)
E: me too! haha
M: but definitely s! I know!
E: still bitter eh? yes!
M: we'll definitely get together this summer!
E: hes crazy and i love it. Yes. question for you
M: I'm not bitter, yea
E: totally random
M: okay
E: but
M: just get to the point :):)
E: i have this guy i want you to meet
M: OMG! who?!?! are you dating him?!?!?!?
E: i think you two would totally hit it off
M: OMG. OMG OMG. who is it?!?!?!
E: NO!!! for you! his name is E. F. check him out. hes a friend of mine on fb. hes going to be 36 soon...that too old??
M: OMG!!!!! what's his story?
E: well hes my VP at work
M: hmmmm....
E: he is being deployed at the end of july though. But
M: ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!!?
E: hes super nice isnt into games and all that. claims hes never cheated on a gf. i know i know. hes been in training for the past 5 months. and just came back last week. and i just needed to mention it to you
M: I'm copying and pasting this convo to my family
E: ahhhh why?!? hes successful. owns his own place. looking to get a house when he comes back. wants kids
M: because you're trying to set me up with a 36 year old who's about to be DEPLOYED!!!!!! well, that sounds wonderful
E: haha
M: when does he come back?
E: next june. so hes gone about a year
M: does he know that you think we would be good for each other?
E: yea. ive mentioned it to him
M: hahahahaha. and what did HE say?!?! where is he being deployed to?
E: hes going to iraq
M: omg
E: hes fairly high up in the military ranks. he said its not an ideal situation
M: omg. he's cute- - i just looked him up
E: but he would be up for meeting you. Haha. hes a good guy
M: is he trying to set something up so he has someone to come home to?!?!?!?!. this sounds very WWIIish...
E: no no no
M: leaving a girl at home while you go off to combat
E: he knows hes not going to leave with a gf
M: will I need to ration my sugar?
E: or anythign like that. HAHAHAHA. you kill me
M: I'm kidding, obviously :):) has he seen my pic?
E: i know. yes
M: i look skinnier in it than I am in real life...
E: oh please. you are ridiculous
M: you know me.... my personality can be a bit.... umm... overwhelming. did you tell him that? okay, so he said he'd be up for meeting up?
E: i said you are very mature
M: why hasn't he met someone in Boston?!?! (it's true, I am)
E: and we used to call you the mom of our team
M:hahahahahahahahahahaha. okay okay okay
E: yes

It's Sunday

This week marks the last week of the first summer session of grad school. Even though it’s totally sucked, I (kind of) have to admit that it went by quickly. That being said, I still have about 27,000 things to accomplish before Thursdays night’s last classes and a WHOLE new summer session starting next week to look forward to. Here’s to a VERY productive beginning of the week.

I can’t believe it’s Sunday night. Again. Does that ever happen to you? This is the THIRD Sunday I’ve had since school got out and I feel like I’m still adjusting to summer schedule. I don’t know where the weeks are going. All of the sudden it’s like- - BAM! SUNDAY NIGHT!

This weekend went by exceptionally fast because I was so busy. Friday, Sister #4 came down so Friday afternoon/night/Saturday morning was spent with her and Sister #2. Sister #3 couldn’t make it; she was in the Bahamas. (Yea, we didn’t feel too bad about that either.) The weather down here has been crazy so it’s been too tough to plan any activities outside. We had enough of watching the Soap Net Friday afternoon and we headed down to Greenwich Ave to browse. Notice I say BROWSE. Shopping? On Greenwich Ave? Is definitely not in these girl’s budgets. I, myself, could always pretend and try stuff on and browse but my sisters do not have the same appreciation. I did convince them however to accompany me into JCrew (I had a $100 gift card) and I scored a new skirt, shirt and flip flops for $40. I know. It was awesome. I think my big score enticed sister #2 to find some of her own bargains so when we walked by Lucy she asked if we minded stopping...

I’ve never been into a Lucy store so I didn’t know what to expect but their window display was cute and I’m always searching for workout clothes for running and Jazzercise. We (obviously) headed straight to the back to the sales rack and Sister #2 almost couldn’t contain her excitement. She is NOT a shopper by any means so I got excited solely based on her excitement. Before you knew it we were scanning the racks and pulling out different pieces to mix and match. She just recently started attending Bikram Yoga classes in the city so she needed some outfits to wear. The saleswoman was so helpful and as my sister was walking into the dressing room with a top and a pair of shorts the sales woman says, “Oh, what size are those shorts?” Sister #2 answers, “XS”. (I know, gag me.) The saleswoman replied, “Ah, I think you’re going to need a Double XS.” I did a double take. As in X.X.S. TWO X’s before the S. DOUBLE EXTRA SMALL. Are you following this?!? I could have died. And you know what? Lucy sales woman was right. Sister #2 walked out from behind that curtain and those EXTRA-EXTRA-small shorts fit her perfectly. Meanwhile I was knocking down hangers with my fat ass. If she wasn’t my sister and I didn’t like her so much, I’d totally hate on that skinny B.

We ended up leaving with two new outfits for my sister. (If I fit into XXS I’d have bought the whole damn store.) She bought one for herself to have RIGHTNOW and I bought her one for her birthday that’s coming up. I usually like to keep things a SURPRISE, but she really loved this stuff so I couldn’t resist.

I’m currently watching Army Wives as I type this. Does anyone else watch this? I’ve only seen it twice, but I’m slowly becoming addicted. I hope this doesn’t interfere with Brothers and Sisters come September.

ALSO?!?!? I saw The Hangover today. FUNNIEST movie I’ve seen in a while. You’ve got to go see it. Really. I was laughing uncontrollably at one point. Couldn’t even catch my breath.

Taken

I'm sure I'm about... 6 months behind the 8-Ball, but I watched Taken tonight. It was fantastic. If you haven't seen it yet, I highly recommend it.

I am also totally having a mental block with the whole diet/WW thing. I'm feeling like a miserable, fat, mess. I'm hoping tomorrow brings a new (sunny?!?!?!) day and a new attitude. I would tell you all of the things that I ate today, but you would probably vomit in your mouth. It's sick. Also, typing it out would hold me accountable for it. And right now? I'd rather not.

I told my sister's boyfriend's mom how much I weighed last night. I thought she was going to have a heart attack. I don't know if I should be flattered that I may not look like I weigh that much or if I should be depressed that I weigh the amount that I do.

Obviously my weight is an issue. I'm working on it.