Thursday, June 11, 2009

Because I'm too Lazy for Texts From Last Night

These really, need no explanation. Text messages I've received in the past 3 months that I've been saving because they're so damn funny.

B- "Always look forward to seeing you. Ur like a 58 on a scale of 1 to 10."

S- "3 hrs shopping on 5th and in Soho and I came away with a 6pack of beer."

M- FWD" yea...A's gettin' pissed...S keeps dumping clothes and suggesting fans (T needs noise to sleep) and an iron (T needs for his shirt) and A goes, "He'll be FINE".

J- "So, Gabrielle Union and Kristen Bell?"

D- "I decided I hated what I wore today. So dowdy. I looked like a lame teacher. Who is a wuss and has no authority. That skirts going to good will. I don't want to be soft. it wasn't hip enough. I'm too young to be soft. I looked like a 35 year old Kindergarten teacher.

A- "Dad just called you a den mother instead of an RA."

D- "Wasted. Wish you were with me. I look lame. People are in trendy clothes and I look like lame Miss America. I literally think I have a shot at miss america. is that pathetic?"

S- "Is it weird I"m home alone. Wasted. Watching the Bruins game?"

D- "If you saw my hair you would DIE. HUGE. DJ Tanner in her preteen years."

D- "find the nearest babe and flirt ur hot ass with him...I'm sure. Well, shes not you. so its obviously a down grade. hes settled since you aren't there...Nope. do ur fake smile. be the bigger person. just don't order gravy fries in front of him :)...Oh puhlease. dont do that! you are she has no curves. F THAT...AHAHAHAHAHAHA. I can't wait to come to VT...duh. This summer. I'll show those gel-haired b*tches whats up...gel hair. muahahahahaha. you should just die over that. that proves he has no taste. done deal. F'in loser. he wouldn't know a good thing if slapped his n*ts...get it through ur head. you're the hottest B in the place- and i'm not even there and I'd bet everything on's reality dude. I speak the truth."

R- "I wore a woman's thong in a 36 degree pool2nite."



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